The Soldier Next Door

This has made me realize once again how precious life is. It has made me realize that you can do everything in your own power to protect the person you love, and yet there will be an evil that will find its way in.

Coming so close to losing each other has reminded me how fragile our relationship is. Even though we have known each other for over a year, it still seems yet so new and vulnerable. What does bring my heart the joy is that no matter what gets kicked in our way that we always come out stronger than before. Each day I pray for the day that it shall all be without any problems in our life.

Do I believe that we are getting tested?

I believe that we are getting pushed to a limit to see how much we can break. We have broken many times, and sometimes we did not know that we can be put back to getter again. But there is nothing stronger than love; there is no glue stronger than love that can fix the pieces.

Your mom always tells you that life is never going to be easy, and she tries as hard as she can to teach you those important lessons of life. Those lessons, that in times like these that we always forget.Text content © NôvelDrama.Org.

Life is a continuous learning experience. Throughout our lives, we keep rising and falling, picking up important lessons along the way. Some of these lessons come from experience, yet there are others that we learn by watching others or even as simple as read a book.

There are some life lessons that we cannot learn until we face them. Most people would say that there are some lessons that come too late; they catch us off-guard when we are unprepared.

What my dad was never prepared for was that somewhere along the line, we realized that though we want to live forever, that we…

Need to walk our own path.

Now do not get me wrong here; we surely do not mean for this to happen, this was a mistake; that was not choosing a road that was planned. But is that not choosing a path then?

I do not see it as one.

We have strived to build a future for ourselves. This is the path that you need to walk on your own. Your future, you are not listening to what other people say when they judge you. Never shall my dad nor I let anyone influence our vision in life.

This is a lesson that I need my children to learn one day.

Walk your own path.

When you were young, yes, you are supposed to do as your mother and father say. Your dreams are not yet formed, for you are only but a young child. You do not even know what life has to offer, and you only live by the rules that your parents set for you. Life is simple, and you follow the path that they chose for you. They, when they see they are going the wrong way, they shall direct you in the way that you should go. Teaching a child to live towards what their goal and their dreams are is easy.

Yes, and that is what I shall teach my children, but only in a sense until they can one day start making their own choice.

Once you reach that age when they ask you, “What do you want to be when you grow up.” That is the time that you have the power to starting walking towards your own dream, and you are creating your own path.

Did my dad, when he was at a tender age, have this planned for himself?

There is nothing that he did wrong or could have even done to have prevented this from creeping into his body. His dream was not to be sick. He did not want to spend endless hours in pain. He once told me having a headache, it is taking a cheese grater and start grating you head to pieces. The mere thought sent horror through my body.

He did not even stray from his path and thought that this would happen?

What path did he choose then?

It was chosen for him. Not by himself, nor by his parents. Not only has he been given a raw deal, but he is also nearly completely alone.

It is up to me to try to keep him on a path, what path; as I said, I do not know.

Every time he tries to do something different, something that he has not done the day before, but yet, as now, while I am waiting for him to come back from the tests, he still has not chosen this path.

Everyone thinks it is easy. “How is your dad?” Is all that they say. What do you tell them?

He does not have a path to follow.

I cannot imagine anything worse that has happened in my life to compare it to his. Yes, all those years when I went out and got drunk and get sick and wake up with a headache. I would take a simple little aspirin, and my headache would be away.

Not my dad.

There is nothing so strong, that the doctor can give him to take his pain away. He carries himself through it every day, and every day his life is the same. That, which is even sad to say.

But we are not losing hope.

My dad will have a path which he can choose.

It might not happen today or tomorrow, but I believe with a strong heart that he shall edge closer and closer to that.

What does bring my heart a further a, every second that he is in pain I cry.

Whoever said that life is not fair, well, I am saying that he is very wise. But don’t they also say you get what you give. Now I would love to know what my dad has done to get what he is given?

My heart breaks every second, and yes, I said that love is the strongest glue, but illness cannot put my dad and me back. Our love is what keeps us hanging on together. Our love is choosing our path.

And even though I know what the path is that I want to follow, this is telling, sorry, not today.

So, see, it is not only people that make you stray from your path; it is an illness, an evil that tells you what shall happen to you today. And, god, it is not predictable because yesterday he was fine; today, he cannot move.

I honestly, and they say that it is such a strong word, but I hate this illness. It has ruined the man that I love. It has let him stray from a path even before he could choose it. The one thing that I can not give him is health; yes, I will be there. But how do you start taking that away?

My path has become to find a way for him to get better. But my hands are tied, and there is nothing that I can do at all. I am a weak man, and I have no idea where I am going. I have a beautiful little baby coming, and I want for him to see it grow up. We don’t know where my dad is going.

Can anyone help us?

No.

We only have each other, and we both need to push this through. Our goal is for him to get better. I can with certainty say that one of these we shall achieve.

We need to find that path.

No matter what happens.

This is what I repeat in my head over and over as four hours have now passed; it is only total agony as we wait in anticipation.

The fear that I felt four hours ago has not changed but for a moment. I am still terrified, and I am shocked to horror at what the outcome might be. Yes, I still fear that he will not come back. One cannot help but feel this; it is just human; we think the worst before the best even happens.

But yes, time has been going by faster than we would have wanted, time spent with bad memories and, do I even dare to say, regrets.

Life is short and that tomorrow isn’t guaranteed.

No one said this would be easy. But I’m thankful that it’s been hard. I’m thankful because it means this is for real. That we’re for real. And that we’re going to make it through no matter what. And when you know that, you realize that everything else, the worries and the struggles, they can take a backseat on this beautiful ride we’re on together.

So yes, I do need to remember that I should not stop believing in myself, no matter what happens. I should not stop believing in my dad.

He needs to find his path and walk it in freedom.

And it is that path that the Doctor walks as he brings me the news of the outcome of the tests.