A Love Restored

“Im so sorry.” Nua whispers frantically. “I didn’t know that Dante-

“It’s okay.” I tell her. “Come in.”

Who is it, darlin?” Julian calls as he walks to the door, and stops short when he sees Nua. All the color drains from his

He whispers. He takes the few steps toward her.

“I’m so sorry, Dante.” She says in that sweet voice of hers. She’s crying. “I shouldn’t have come. I’m so sorry, I’m so sorry.”

My heart breaks for her. We’re both just pawns in this sick confusion of his

Nua turns around to leave, but Julian interrupts her, “Just, just come in. He says roughly. She steps in

inside the house gingerly and I shut the door behind her. Great, just what I wanted. This couldn’t get any worse than it already is

Nua sits down on Julian’s couch. He follows her, I follow him.

“I just came to talk about what my father said today. I’m sorry. She gestures to me, “I didn’t know.” I don’t like this feeling. It feels like I am the third party, the outsider, not her.

“Nua,” Julian sighs. “Its complicated.”Contentt bel0ngs to N0ve/lDrâ/ma.O(r)g!

She nods. I understand.”

I clench my eyes in anger. Its not this girl’s fault. She shouldn’t understand. He’s supposed to be her goddamn fiance.

I retreat to the kitchen. Julian notices. I don’t know if he knows I can hear them talk from here.

“It just surprised me to see someone else here.” Nua says softly. “But I understand. It’s just that, I have been loyal to you since Papa told me I am to he married to you, Dante. But I know you don’t owe me anything like that. I’m sorry for crying and making a scene. My father keeps mistresses. You do too. It’s okay. I just didn’t know.”

My heart breaks for her. She has never seen love around her. She has never felt love. She is only fulfilling her duty, like her mother did, and doesn’t even understand that normal relationships, normal marriages aren’t supposed to be so painful.

Julian sighs. I can almost imagine his fingers pressing on his temple. I can see the expression on his face. “No, Nua. She’s not my mistress.”

“Do you love her, then? Is that why you’re delaying the wedding? I understand if you do.”

“It’s complicated, Nua.”

I hate hearing him say her name. It rolls of his tongue perfectly. I thought it was only with mine.

Ginevra. Ginevra. Ginevra. My name in his voice echoes through my head all day.

“I can’t just get engaged to you within this week, Nuo. We barely know each other. We don’t love each other.”

“A marriage like ours isn’t for love.”

There is silence for a while. I hold my breath.

“Did she know?” Nus asks,

“Yes.” Julian says, You don’t have to worry. You’ll be the one I marry Ginevra is just…Cineven. She’s not important.”

“I’m sorry Papa treated you like that today. He is very protective of me. And he thinks you are stalling because you just want our businesses

without marrying me. I talked to him. He understands now. He’ll give us time.”

“That’s great.”

1. c. You’re not

“I love spending time with you, Julian. I always thought I’d get married off to some mafioso who was old and gray and violent towards me. like that. I know this is not the perfect marriage either of us would want, but I really wish to make this work with you.”

“Me too, Nua.” I hear Julian say, “We’ll make it work. How did you get here this late in the night? Does your father know?”

“I sneaked out.” She giggles. Its not filled with mirth. Its the kind of giggle women do when they’re around men – to pacify them about things they know they’ll get mad about. Nua is very young, but i think she has seen a lot. Its very clear to see.

“That’s not safe, Nua. Don’t do it again.”

Hearing him scold her like that, softly, caring, makes my heart clench. I always imagined Julian would be cold with her. After all, it was all a farce.

But, maybe it isn’t.

Ginevra is just… Ginevra. She’s not important.

I sit down on the kitchen island and bury my face in my hands, listening to them talk. I filter out most of what they’re saying, my head swarming

with thoughts and riddled with confusion. And pain. My eyes clenched, I try not to let a tear leak out.

“Do you.” I hear Nua say, “Do you think someday you will be able to love me like most husbands do?”

There is a pause.

“Of course. I will love you, Nua. I promise.*

I do not cry. I don’t even shed one tear. I don’t think I feel anything. Just.. numb. I gather myself up off the floor, and make my way to Julian’s room. I change my clothes and begin collecting my things. Some clothes, a toothbrush. Headphones. A towel. A book of Italian poetry Nico gave me that I thought I’d read to Julian. Lipstick and a hairbrush. 1 pack it all up,

On Julian’s bed I leave a note, along with the necklace he gave me.

I love you, Julian, but I think we are better off apart. I have had some of the best days of my life with you. No one makes me happy like you do, but no one has made me go through the pain and torment you do. I know you don’t want to, I know you’re trying to fix things, but we’re better off this way. thank you for giving me your symbol. It made me feel invincible when I wore it out. I think someone else should have it now. I hope you remember me for a while. Nua is a nice girl. Be good to her. I hope you both will be very happy together. Please don’t try to fix this. Please don’t contact me again.

Ginevra

I slip out the door softly while Julian and Nua talk in the living rooms.

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