Chapter 25 Smith
I kept that last part to myself, though, because I didn’t want her blaming Cullen’s overprotectiveness for me backing away. The fact was, there was a part of me that needed time outside her circle of hotness to think straight. Not any part below the waist, of course, but somewhere in my cranium, I knew that Cullen was only part of the problem. My fucked-up childhood-moving from foster home to foster home before being adopted-had left a space inside me where trust used to live. Too many times, I’d let myself be lulled by a warm hug and a soft heart. I let hope in, and then just when I thought things would be all right, I’d been ripped away again. New family. New problems.
After a while, it had become more than clear that hope was the enemy. Expect the least, and you’ll never be disappointed. The Smith Hamilton human-relationships credo.
So it had been easy enough to keep a distance between myself and the women I slept with. If they opted out after a few weeks, it was fine because I’d never really opted in.
With Evie, that wasn’t an option.
I was either in or out, because I cared. A lot. A lot more than I ever expected to. And the last thing I wanted to do was hurt her.
“You’re a great guy, Smith. I’m not asking for a proposal, you know. I just want you to be my first real lover, is all,” she said softly.
The word “first” implied there would be more after me, and the thought sent a hot knife of jealousy straight through me. It was all I could do not to say fuck it and take her right there. Make her forget that any other man even existed.
That inclination alone was enough to sober me and get my mind right.
“I want to hang out with you, Evie. I want us to spend more time together, but until we’ve got some idea of what exactly this is, we have to keep it in the friend zone. Can we do that?” I asked, watching her face for clues as to whether I was asking for too much.
She nodded slowly and ran a trembling hand through her hair. “I think I’d like that. I-I had fun too. I definitely want to spend more time together. And no telling Cullen anything, agreed?”
“Agreed.”
She excused herself to the bathroom, and I was grateful for the reprieve as I cleaned up the dishes. It was going to be tough, but there was a sense of relief there too. At least I’d get to spend more time with Evie, and for now, that was enough.
• • •
Three hours later, though, as I watched her drive away, it was far from enough.
I was a man on a ledge again.
After watching a rom-com-her choice, and a drama-mine, we’d wound up snuggled together on the couch. It was long past midnight, and I’d wanted nothing more than to carry her into my bedroom and kiss her until that sleepy look disappeared. She’d been the strong one then, getting up and giving me a light peck on the mouth before gathering up her things.
“This was really nice, Smith. Thank you.” The regret on her face was almost completely concealed as I walked her to her car and she slid in.
“Text me when you get home,” I said, patting the hood of the car.
I made it all the way back into my living room before I had my pants unzipped and my cock in hand.
“Fu-uck,” I groaned, the ache in my groin making the pressure of my hand almost painful.
I dropped back onto the couch, my face just an inch from where Evie’s head had been, and breathed in the scent of her shampoo. Squeezing my eyes closed, I stroked my shaft up and down. Long, easy strokes for as long as I could stand it, and then faster. I let all the mental footage I had of Evie form a movie, filling in the gaps in my perverted imagination. What I came up with was the best porno in the world, and my heart knocked against my ribs so hard, I could hear it as I worked my cock over.
“I want you to come inside me, Smith,” she whispered as she rode me up and down, faster and faster.
She pressed two fingers to her clit and moved them in a gentle circular motion as she impaled herself all the way onto my distended cock, taking me in to the hilt. Her pussy clenched, gently at first, but then harder as her nipples went tight and she threw her head back.
“Yes, yes!”
“Yes” was fucking right, because I was right behind her. My muscles tensed and my cock went rock hard. A second later, I bellowed her name and white light shot behind my eyelids as I came on my stomach in spurts.
My breath was still sawing in and out of my lungs when my cell phone buzzed and Evie’s text lit up my screen.
Evie: Made it.
Christ, that made two of us.
My low laugh was more of a groan as I snagged a handful of tissues from the coffee table.
After I cleaned off, I thumbed out a quick reply.Please check at N/ôvel(D)rama.Org.
Smith: See you soon.
I realized with a start that, even if it was tomorrow, it wouldn’t be soon enough. I didn’t know I was starving until I’d tasted her.