The Lycan’s Human Mate

I said with all sincerity, “I’m sorry for what happened to her”Upstodatee from Novel(D)ra/m/a.O(r)g

I feel like I need to say that knowing that Lara was a close friend to Traian.

“You don’t need to. She is aware of the consequences of her actions and had a choice,” he said, starting to stroke my ankle with his thumbs.

Once again, silence swept over the space.

“I’m sorry”

“I’m sorry”

Both of us simultaneously said. He merely grinned, and I laughed.

He beckoned and said, “Ladies first.”

I nibbled my lower lip, contemplating. I inhaled deeply before speaking up after gathering my confidence.

“I’m sorry. I’m very sorry for the things I spoke to you about that night. I know it’s extremely late for my apology, but I still want you to know that I didn’t mean those words. I-I was simply hurt and confused at that time,” I muttered as I fiddled with the blanket.

My eyes began to well up with tears. I quickly brushed the tear away while keeping my eyes on the blanket that was covering my thighs. I bit my bottom lip.

“I… I honestly felt deceived at that time since no one told me the truth. The world of Shifters was something I never imagined in my life. And the knowledge about mates simply made it a whole confusing for me. I believed my feelings for you were just an illusion because of our mate bond. I’m so-” I turned to face Traian, who was looking at me intensely.

He stood up, leaned toward me, and placed his lips on mine before I could finish my sentence. My eyes automatically shut. I kissed him back and we kissed just slowly and passionately, putting our real emotions on it. As soon as we pulled away, he cupped my cheek as I gasped for air. He was staring at my parted lips before he held my gaze.

“And I love you” he whispered.

I chuckled, burying my face in the crook of his neck. His seductive scent overwhelmed me in a split second.

He asked, amused, “What?”

As he laughed, I could feel the movement and vibration of his chest.

“I was apologizing”

“And confessing,” he said nonchalantly.

I stared at him, a smile still on my face “Am I?” ”

He took my hand and replied, “Yes. You claimed that you believed your feelings for me were simply an illusion because of the mate bond. You have feelings for me”

“That’s what you only got from my speech?” I exclaimed.

“No, I was moved by everything you spoke, but that one struck a deeper chord with me. Because I know that the others were invalid now”

I asked, my voice alarmed, “What do you mean? Am I really late to apologize?”

“No, because there’s nothing to be forgiven about”

“I hurt you. You should be mad at me”

“Yes, you’ve hurt me, but I know that it’s a reflection of how you’re feeling that night. You’re hurt too. And I won’t ever be angry with you, love. You should get used to that idea”

He inhaled deeply and squeezed my hand gently before saying, “If anybody should apologize, it should be me since I lied to you despite having several chances to do so and I failed to realize the pain you were experiencing that night. I’m sorry because I promised myself to protect you, but obviously, I didn’t do enough to do so, and I even caused it.”

“Because my sister asked you to give her time and she would be the one who will explain everything to me,” I voiced out.

“How did you know that?”

“I recognized where your bribe for me to stay here for another week came from when I asked Jane about why they had decided to come here so suddenly and she said that she had to tell me something and that she requested you to give her some time”

He was going to speak but immediately shut his mouth.

“I also have an idea of what my parents and sister are about to tell me. I know it was how we are from the ancestors of the families who were pledged to Shifters” I added.

“You already knew that?” His eyes shone with pride and amazement as he turned to face me. “Wow, I underestimated what you have read in our hidden library”

I responded with surprise, “How did you know I went there?”

“We have keen smells and someone smells your scent there”

I nodded. While keeping Traian’s hand in mine, I spoke, remembering all the information I gathered, “I know that Shifters are half wolf and half man. You and your wolf are one like he was your soul or something. Grevis Town had a pack of Shifters, and you are their Alpha-their leader. Shifters have mates, like soul mates, and millions of years ago there were human families who were betrothed to Shifters just as there are potentialities for Shifters having human partners today.”

“You got the gist,” he said with a grin.

“I know and I really am interested to read those books again”

I kind of wished to reread those antique classics as I remembered them. Now I was starting to feel the thrill of reading such literature. Because the last time, I was so shocked and devastated that I failed to recognize how fascinating the material in the book was.

He responded with amazement, “You do?”

“Of course. Learning new things and information was really my thing and those old-age books have extra points”

“Then I’ll bring some of those books tomorrow,” he said after giving it some thought. “And you could run across Lycans.”

I wondered, “Lycans? What are those? Like shifters also?”

He smirked, “Yes, it was a distinct group of Shifters, and I truly belong to that one,”

I frowned, “You are a Lycan, so all of the people in your town, by which I mean your pack, are Lycans”

Grevis Town as a pack, and terminology specific to the world of shifters, are concepts that are foreign to me. I need to study that first.

“No, I’m the only Lycan in our pack. My packmates are called Shifters or werewolves. Lycans differ somewhat from them in our world.”

“Different as in?”

He whispered to himself, but I could still hear him: “I will give you the books tomorrow, or maybe some other day. The doctors instructed you not to strain yourself too hard, especially in analyzing things.”

I pouted and murmured, “Oh, what a bummer.”

Even if I occasionally read, I’ve given myself a limit by just consuming 2–5 pages in the first week of my recovery. But I have stepped up a little these days to 10 pages. I can’t wait to finish the book I was reading.

My train of thought stopped when I felt him kissing me again. Before I could respond, he withdrew and resumed caressing my hand as if nothing had happened. I looked at him, confused.

“I thought you were asking to be kissed because you’re pouting,” he simply said.

I said, hiding my redness with a laugh, “What? You-oh my gosh”

“I know you like it but you’re too shy to admit it,” he added.

“I didn’t know you have such self-confidence in you”

He shifted his gaze at me, “When it comes to you, yes,”

That made me smile as he beamed at me. Again, stillness descended upon us after that, until Traian finally broke it.

“Jaidyn” he called seriously but his face showed hesitation.

“Yes?”

He opened his lips as if to say something, then quickly shut them, shaking his head, “Nothing, I only want to call your name,”

I directed my gaze out the window where the brilliant moon and countless stars were set in the night sky.

I had to say it. I need to say it to him first.

I said, “Traian,” as I turned to face him.

“Hmm?”

I took a deep breath and held his hand firmly. With looking deeply into his mesmerizing blue eyes, I spoke the plan I had in my mind for the past few days, “I will still leave”

His eyes flashed with emotional turmoil. He looked down in an instant, inhaling and I felt him about to pull away his hand but I held it tightly.

I continued, “Because I want to start all over again.”

He turned his head toward me.

I smiled at him, “I want to find myself again and make sure that I have moved on from the pain of my past relationship. I like you, Traian, but I don’t want to continue whatever we have while I have doubts about myself. I want to continue like you until I have fully admitted to myself that I have moved on.” I squeezed his hand and added, “I want to like you when I know I am fully healed. I want to love you when I finally know myself again. I want to love you truthfully and transparently. I believe you deserve that kind of me”

He gave me a long glance before turning to look at our clasped hands. “Have you told anyone yet?”

“No, you’re the first person I informed about my idea,”

We sank into another silence when he nodded. I was prepared for his reaction. I have played it numerous times in my head when I thought of my plan. The lack of sound, the sadness in his eyes, and the desire to leave earlier. But when it was happening, I was also hurting because I had hurt him again.

But I don’t want to love him when I am deeply broken inside. I don’t want to have any doubts about my love for him. That is not something he deserves.

“I will not be able to bribe you with anything, aren’t I?” he chuckled dryly.

I sadly smiled, “Yeah”

He took a long breath and tightly linked our hands together. “You will come back to me, right?”

“That is if the sky is destined to let us meet someday but if not, I will come back to you either way”

“Promise me,” He said earnestly, “Promise me, Jaidyn.”

I nodded at him and stared into his blue eyes, “I promise to come back to you, Traian”

He smiled and kissed the back of my hand, “That’s good for now”

That’s a promise I will keep. I will come back to him.