The Glimpse of My Past

Diane’s P. O. V.

Still shy to face him and finally move on from how silly I reacted moments ago, I removed my hands from my face and placidly stared at Liam when I heard him continue his confession. He looked quite morose.

“I intended to switch off my phone whenever I was too busy resolving huge company issues. One of the L. A. Gadgets International branches got bankrupt in Boston,” he stated. I could feel his pain.

“But, why didn’t you tell me? I could have at least helped you,” I told him. Liam was already facing bankruptcy, and I just couldn’t do anything.

So, that was the meaning of what I accidentally saw from one of the Assets and Liabilities Stateside Reports last month. Liabilities were higher compared to known assets, and that could make a company go bankrupt. Why didn’t I ever think of that?

Other situations in the business economy include market condition, financing, competition, control costs, and poor decision making-which I guessed that Liam would never be at fault. He was adept at making tough decisions anyway. I remembered reading a startup article before that newly launched companies were quite risky and might have ended up liquidating all assets.

But with Liam’s capability, I knew for sure that he would get all the profits back in just a snap of his fingers. I just hoped that everything was not yet critical and still under his control. And for him to be able to do that, he needed my full support.

“I didn’t want to drag you to my problems, Diane. Believe me, I wanted to share it with you, but I didn’t because it would only make you feel worried about me and the company. Being the CEO, thousands of lives depend on me. You know that, right?” Liam gazed at me, and I was like butter-ready to melt again just by staring at his mesmerizing dark-gray eyes.

Sympathizing with him, I just nodded. I knew it, and yet, I wasn’t able to entirely understand him. All I could think of was my own feelings. I didn’t even give him the chance to explain before misconstruing things. Lorenz was right above everything-that Liam might be facing bankruptcy. 

“But now, I still couldn’t figure out the reason behind that failure, as well as the D’ Jewelries branch in New Bedford. I don’t want to go through a recession, and for that, I need to go back to the States at the soonest time possible.”

Liam’s voice clearly demonstrated sadness. I just felt so guilty for not giving him the chance to tell me what truly happened. I didn’t lend him my shoulders to lean on and, especially, my ears to listen. I just accused him without having enough evidence, and my boyfriend doesn’t deserve it.

My heart sank for him, and it even made me tight-lipped. I wanted to embrace him with all my heart, but the guilt was holding me back. It prompted me to question myself if I really deserved his love.

“But before anything else, I wanted to make sure that we’re already married so we could go there together. I would be staying there indefinitely, and I’m not sure how long it would take me to recover from all the lost profits and revenues. I don’t want to leave you here alone.”ConTEent bel0ngs to Nôv(e)lD/rama(.)Org .

He paused for a while before he continued. “I told you, I will explain everything… but I guessed, I forgot that I have a very impatient girlfriend here.” That was when he smiled and showed again his dimple. He winked at me after he playfully pinched my nose.

Fidgeting, I swallowed the lump on my constricted throat after hearing all of these. I was so stupid to get mad at Liam for no justified reason. I wasn’t able to think things through and just let my emotions overrule my thoughts.

Shit! I couldn’t feel any guiltier than this. Oh my God! You’ve just let your stupidity take over and ruin things again, Diane.

But wait, there’s more… I still have one last question.

I was ready to throw myself on him, wrap my arms around him, and utter my sincere apology when I remembered something. It was that one last crucial thing I should never forget here.

Something still kept on bothering my brain, and Liam had not yet given an answer based on the things that he already told me. He had to make me realize that my jealousy was totally nothing and had no real basis. 

“Wait!” I screamed all of a sudden. If Liam could explain this one-last-thing to me, then I would be all set. I would finally give him my sweetest yes.

My boyfriend loomed over and was about to hug me when I stepped backwards and did a ‘stop’ sign using my right hand. My heart was pounding, making me take a deep breath before I spoke again.

After that, I raised my left eyebrow. As if looking at myself in front of the mirror, my on-fleek eyebrow never left its highest arc the moment I opened my mouth-with my face revealing a menacing scowl.

“That one person you always talked to on your phone, I wanted to know about her. Usually, you’re giving me the authority to answer your phone.” Mixed emotions ordered me to change my demeanor from an understanding girlfriend into someone who got eaten by extreme jealousy. I was eyeing Liam intently.

Then, I continued. “But these past few weeks we’ve been together, you always answered your phone as fast as you could, then… you would walk away from me. It was as if you didn’t want me to hear any of your conversations!”

Bursting out suspicious emotions when speaking, I didn’t even know if I would get annoyed even more because Liam seemed to be laughing at what I was saying. He wasn’t taking things seriously, and that even made me as furious as hell here.

“And one time, I heard you, Liam… you called her Honey! I couldn’t be all wrong. I heard it right! Please, don’t you dare lie to me. Who is that Honey? Who is she?” I was teary-eyed once more, and it was too late for me to realize that the jealousy inside my heart had already exploded like a silent hand grenade. It killed all the understanding I should only feel at the moment.

That was when I heard Liam finally burst out laughing and it was a kind of surprise for me. He looked like he never did anything wrong when he should be defensive on denying everything. I was mad at him, but why did I find his laugh damn so sexy?

“Is my future wife really that grave when it comes to being jealous, huh? Come here so I can trap you in my arms,” Liam avowed.

He crossed the remaining distance between us with his mission to cage me. I wasn’t able to push him away when he suddenly placed his strong arm around my shoulder and pulled me closer to his body.

Then, he cuddled me in a skintight manner as if he didn’t want me to be away from him. My head was on his chest, and I could clearly hear his heartbeats. “Hmm, I missed this…” he groaned.

“How couldn’t I walk away from you when we were talking about wedding plans that I wouldn’t want you to eavesdrop on? I used to call her Honey because her name was definitely Honey, and she was none other than the same Neyrah inside your house-Shey’s younger sister,” Liam explained as he released me and cupped my face.

“Her real name was Honeyrah, who also happened to be my second cousin and one of the best wedding planners in Italy. You don’t have to be jealous of her, okay? But I guessed it was my fault then. I should have called her Neyrah over the phone and not Honey-causing a rage to my real honey.” Liam leaned forward and kissed my forehead wholeheartedly.

What the… so, that Honey was in fact-Neyrah? Damn! Why does she have to use so many nicknames? I gasped.

When I heard Liam’s explanations, I felt like I didn’t really have the courage to face him anymore. It was the main reason why many people could die out of delusions and wrong assumptions. He did all these surprises, and in just a matter of minutes, his efforts had completely gone into wastes because of me.

Liam might have sleepless nights while managing EGC and planning the surprised wedding, but I never appreciated it. If only I had trusted him as much as I would always say, I wouldn’t have doubted the love and care he was relentlessly giving me.

Why would I even have so many insecurities? Was Liam’s love not enough to the point that I even broke the superb and incomparable wedding proposal he had been working on these past few weeks?

Losing this burden out of my chest, I couldn’t help myself but feel shamefaced and mortified. Looking back at how Liam gave way to any of my clumsiness and shortcomings before, guilt was eating me up alive.