Flashbacks
Seeing Maureen, I walked directly, without glancing back, leaving the house in annoyance since I was supposed to have breakfast in the garden.
Upon spotting a taxi, I quickly hailed it, clutching my phone containing my ATM card, and directed the taxi driver to make a brief detour to the nearest ATM for cash.
I headed to the church, fervently praying and wrestling with the tears I had bottled up. Eventually, I let my emotions flow, relieved that only a handful of people were entering the church, sparing me the discomfort of shedding tears before the Lord.
By noon, I resolved to leave the church, lighting a candle at the side to pray for my parents before my departure.
Afterward, I made my way to the mall, where I enjoyed a meal and watched a movie. Around five in the afternoon, I decided to return home, assuming Maureen was no longer there.
On the way back, I pondered whether I should stay or break the commitment I had made to remain for a month, feeling utterly useless.
Come on, Myla. You’ve been of no use in Ivan’s life for a while now. You should have left a long time ago.
If only I had somewhere to go when Ivan’s parents urged us to marry, I would have left. It had given me hope that Ivan might fall for me, but it never materialized.
“Where have you been?” Ivan inquired upon my arrival at home, perched on the couch. I couldn’t tell if he had been waiting for me or not.
“Just around,” I replied, avoiding eye contact as I continued toward the room. I felt sticky, so a shower was in order, and I planned to speak with my in-laws.
Entering the bathroom, I began undressing, ready to step into the shower when the bathroom door swung open.
“Ivan!” I exclaimed as he walked in. I scrambled to cover myself, but my two arms couldn’t hide my naked body. Turning to shield my bare back from his view, I shot him a sharp look, but he remained unfazed. He appeared as surprised as I was but quickly regained his composure.
“Where have you been?” he repeated, unsatisfied with my response. Stubbornly, he followed me into the bathroom. I stayed silent, realizing he had no intention of leaving.
So, I turned my back to him and began showering.
“Want to join me in the shower?” I quipped, noticing he was still lingering.
“Nah… But watching you shower seems like a good idea,” he replied with a mischievous grin.
My cheeks flushed at his comment. Seriously?
“Nice butt, by the way…” he added.
I rolled my eyes and chose to ignore him, focusing on rinsing my hair and pretending his presence in the bathroom wasn’t making me self-conscious.
I acted like I didn’t care, even though the truth was Ivan’s presence affected me. What he’s doing affects me. There you go again, Myla. Why do your feelings change so rapidly?”
“Staring is rude, Mister…”
“Am I not allowed to admire my beautiful wife while she’s showering?”
I rolled my eyes.
“Wife on paper…” I whispered.
“What did you say?”
“Nothing,” I rinsed my hair before I started soaping my shoulders. I parted my hair to the other side while I thoroughly soaped my shoulder.
“You think you’re seducing me, don’t you?”
What?!
“I’m just cleaning myself! What are you talking about?”
“Oh… You’re not?”
I swiftly lathered the upper portion of my body and rinsed it once more. Then, I used the feminine wash for my private area. When I finished, I retrieved the towel from the nearby hook.
“You haven’t soaped the…”
I gave him a sharp look.
“Whatever, Ivan! What you’re doing won’t change my mind anymore,” I whispered in my final sentence.
“What?”
“Nothing! I’m getting dressed. Your parents and siblings are already here.”
I was the first to leave the bathroom and made my way to the closet to pick out an outfit. I opted for the simple dress my mother-in-law had given me on my last birthday.
I hastily closed the closet door as Ivan peered inside.
“You’re not funny, Ivan.”
I could hear his hearty laughter from the outside.All text © NôvelD(r)a'ma.Org.
Damn it!
Damn it!
False hope!
“So, where were you all afternoon?”
“I had a date!” I replied with irritation.
“What on earth, Myla!”
I was startled by his shouting and door slamming.
“What’s your problem?” I retorted, but he didn’t respond.
I put on some sandals, then blow-dried my hair. I added a touch of red tint to my cheeks and lips before stepping out.
The maid knocked on the door just in time.
“Ma’am, Sir, Madam said dinner will be served early tonight.”
“Alright,” I replied, glancing at Ivan, who was seated on the couch with his head down and his fingers interlocked.
I left him in the room, but he followed me as I descended the stairs.
“Myla,” he called my name.
“Yes?”
He didn’t reply either.
“Good evening,” I greeted my in-laws upon my arrival in the dining area.
“Myla, you look lovely. Is that the dress I gave you on your birthday?”
“Yes, Mom. It’s this one…”
They all smiled, their eyes on me.
“How are you, Ivan? Do you recall anything?”
Our gaze shifted to Ivan, who remained silent. He shook his head as a response.
“Alright, don’t push it.”
Our eyes met, but I looked away at first.
They were engrossed in a discussion about business, so I couldn’t find an opportunity to speak. When dessert was served, they shifted to a conversation about Ivan’s grandfather’s anniversary of death.
Dinner was drawing to a close, but I still couldn’t find a chance to speak.
“Myla?” my mother-in-law inquired. I raised my eyes, and as I noticed that all their gazes were fixed on me, it felt as though a lump had lodged itself in my throat, and I struggled to find the right words.
“Y-Yes?”
“Do you have something to say?” It seemed like Mom was attuned to my unease. She knew me quite well.
“Yes… Uhm…”
I took a sip of water and cleared my throat to ease the apparent blockage.
“I… I…” I managed a smile. “I am planning to leave.”
My mother-in-law’s complexion paled, and the eyes of my in-laws brimmed with questions. She gazed at me inquisitively and then at Ivan.
I couldn’t be certain of Ivan’s reaction, but I could sense his gaze on me. Perhaps he was secretly relieved that I was going to depart.
“Why?” My father-in-law was the first to regain his composure.
Mom mumbled, “I thought you two were doing well. Why do you still need to go?” Her voice quivered as she spoke.
“I want to leave.” I struggled to steady my voice. Shit! Saying goodbye was proving to be more challenging than I had anticipated.
“Ivan! What did you do?” I panicked when they turned to Ivan.
“He did not influence my decision. This is entirely my choice.”
My gaze fixed on Ivan. He appeared very serious, with his jaw clenched slightly. However, after a few moments, he averted his gaze and fixed his gaze on the floor.
I couldn’t decipher his thoughts, but I knew I shouldn’t dwell on it.
“Perhaps you’re just taken by surprise, dear,” my father-in-law gently suggested.
I had been planning to leave for some time, but I was finding it exceptionally difficult. Nonetheless, I needed to stand by my decision.
“I have decided to leave now. Initially, I contemplated not saying goodbye, but it would be unfair to all of you if I did that.”
My mother-in-law burst into tears. “No! Don’t leave, please. Ivan, do something. Don’t let her go!”
Ivan abruptly rose from his seat. I thought he was about to storm out, but to my surprise, he seized my hand and led me to our room.
“Let go of me!” I protested.
Suddenly, he pressed me against the closed door, causing me to gasp.
“You’re leaving?” he asked with a mixture of anger and a touch of tenderness in his voice.
I turned my face away from him. I didn’t want to meet his gaze, fearing it might change my resolve. But what if he were to plead for me to stay? Not that he would.
“Why?” I remained silent, so he gently tilted my chin to make me face him. I resisted initially, but the pain in my jaw eventually made me relent.
“Why?” he inquired.
“Does it matter to you?” I replied softly, feeling weak.
“Are you really leaving while I don’t remember anything?”
I clenched my jaw. “Would anything change if you remembered something? I don’t think so, Ivan.”
“Don’t leave yet.”
Not yet? Not. Yet.
“My decision is final. It’s best for me to leave now. At least, I can carry some good memories with me. If I wait for you to remember, those precious memories we shared will likely turn bitter. Ivan, you hate me so much.”
Tears welled up in my eyes.
“You hate me,” I whispered.
“That’s not how I feel, Myla.”
“It’s because of your amnesia… Please, Ivan. Just let me go.”
“I thought you were going to take care of me first. I thought-”
“I thought I could stay and take care of you, too. I thought, Ivan.”
“Why? Why did you change your mind?”
“I’m jealous, Ivan!”
“Jealous!”
“Even though you genuinely love her, and I’m merely your wife on paper, I still have feelings. I’m human, not a robot. I love you, Ivan. And I’m hurt by Maureen’s frequent visits. I’m in pain, Ivan. I can’t bear it any longer.” I explained, sobbing.
Ivan embraced me, causing my eyes to widen.
“I-I’m sorry, Myla…”
His words touched me even more deeply. Throughout our time together, since we had gotten married, this was the first time he had apologized for all the times he had hurt me.
“I’m sorry,” he said as he pressed our foreheads together. My tears continued to flow.
“Please, stop. I’m sorry.”
I embraced him, burying my face in his chest. In return, he held me. The room was filled with the sound of my gentle sobbing.
“Ah…” Ivan touched his head, seemingly in pain.
“Are you alright?”
“My head hurts…” he panted, appearing to struggle.
“Is it very painful?” I asked in a panic. I didn’t know how to comfort him or what kind of assistance to provide.
“Please, have a seat. I’ll call your mom and ask her to call a doctor,” I said, guiding him to the bed.
His palms were icy, and the veins on the side of his forehead were protruding. His face flushed from his head down to his neck. It looked like it was really painful.
My God! This is my fault! I must have startled him.
“I’ll get your mom,” I assured him as he clung tightly to my hand.
But he held onto me even more firmly.
“I won’t go anywhere. I’ll just call your mom,” I said gently. Only then did he slowly release my hand.
I hurriedly left the room, but I paused when I saw my in-laws near the door.
“Mom! Ivan has a severe headache.”
“What?”
“Kent, call Dr. Cheng,” my father-in-law instructed his son.