#3 Chapter 31
CHAPTER THIRTY
Mimi
He walks differently.
I hear he’s changed.
Not the boy anymore I used to know, not the accountant at Giordano’s Inc., and not the creative tech wiz that makes the beautiful display at The Dark Odyssey.
Salvatore isn’t any of those anymore. He’s a capo.
He walks like a leader now, but he still looks at me the same.
He comes up to me and kisses me.
It’s a kiss that seeps into my soul and speaks of what I want most.
It’s the kind of kiss you savor for all that you feel in the moment because it makes you forget.
For those few seconds as he kisses me I step away from reality and pretend none of this happened.
I pretend that Sorcha is still alive and I didn’t have to hold her dead, lifeless body, tearing up inside for the loss of a woman who was a true friend and angel. A good wife to a man who is like a brother to me.
For a few seconds I imagine it didn’t happen and because it doesn’t feel real, I almost believe it.
Then he stops kissing me and I’m pulled away from the façade I imagined up. I’m yanked back to reality and I look at my guy standing before me with so much sadness in his eyes.
“Come here. I… have to talk to you,” he says and I bite the inside of my lip.
“Okay.” He takes my hand and leads me back into the bedroom.
I had to stay in here away from the other girls last night because I was so distraught.
They both came to sit with me though. Charlotte and Mia. Both of them came and left when Dad arrived.
Salvatore closes the door then sits me down by the dresser near the long French window.
He pulls up a chair and reaches forward to cover my hands with his.
“How are you?” he asks.
“Numb. I can’t believe it. I just can’t. So evil and cruel. Wicked. And… they would have killed Timothy too. And for what Salvatore? Money? Power? What did Vincent do that was so bad that Sorcha deserved to die, and their two month old placed at risk?” I’ll never understand. More and more I see why Mom hated our way of life. I see it so clearly.
Salvatore gives my hands a gentle squeeze.
“That’s… it’s the way Mimi. It doesn’t matter how reasonable or unreasonable something is. The intended blow is always the worst. There’s no question on who deserved what and if what you did was reason enough to be so evil.” He hangs his head down then lifts it back up and looks at me with tears brimming inside his dark eyes. A tell of the storm that must be raging inside him. “I was real proud of you for holding her like that. Sorcha. I was real proud of you, Mimi for being the person you are and being a friend to her in that moment. She loves Vincent and she would have been floored to see you do that for her and for him and he trusted you to hold her. His babygirl.”
I’m all cried out but fresh tears slide down my cheeks. “I did it because I knew she would have wanted me to.”
“I know baby. I know. The sadness is too much for all of us. This is the second time this man has come for us and it’s big. It’s bigger, different.” He straightens up but doesn’t let go of my hand.
“You’re capo… now.”
He nods.
I heard Gabe talking to Charlotte. He came by in the night to check on her. That’s when I heard.
“I was going to tell you. I’m glad you heard though. Mimi… a lot is going to change and um… I’m just going to be real with you. I don’t want you to be a part of it.”
I stare at him, not sure I heard him right. Not sure I heard what he said or if I understand.
“What do you mean? I’m already a part of it. I always have been. I’m with you.”
When he shakes his head my heart squeezes.
“Baby, you don’t have to be. You don’t have to be part of anything. We’re targets. All of us, but you don’t have to be here. Charlotte and Mia are married to the mob. You have a choice.”
“I choose to be with you,” I point out, not liking where this conversation is going. “Salvatore, I chose you.”
“No… you can’t. You can’t Mimi. It’s too dangerous for you to be with me. Yesterday I got a head in a box. Cora… from the club.”
My hands fly up to my mouth and my breath hitches right there in my chest.
“What? What are you saying to me?”
“They killed her Mimi. She said she was mine. I was never with her like that, not once so I don’t know why she would have said that. But that is what being with me will do to you. Stephanou killed Sorcha to send the biggest message of all and to destroy Vincent.”
I start crying because this is all so awful. “Salvatore…”
“Babygirl… I can’t do it. I can’t do that to you. I can’t put you in that kind of danger. I won’t do it. I won’t allow them to kill you just because you’re with me. Not you. Not you Babygirl. And not when I know better and can do better.”
“I want to be with you. Salvatore it’s real between us…”
He nods. “Yes. It is. I love you Maria Cipriani. I always, always have. And I told you I would always put you first. Even if that means letting you go.”
I cry harder and move to him, throwing my arms around him and holding him.
“I love you,” I tell him. “I love you, Salvatore. Don’t let me go. Don’t, don’t let me go.”
He buries his face into the side of my neck and kisses me there.
“I have to Mimi. It’s better this way. I have to. It’s too dangerous for you to be mine.” He pulls away from me and just walks, leaving.
Leaving me.
I watch him go and the numbness turns into a void.
The tears fall but it feels like pieces of my soul weeping. Weeping and reaching for him. The only man I ever loved.
Everything feels like a haze.
The days pass by and I resign myself to my apartment. I don’t know what day it is.
Salvatore sent a letter to me this morning containing a check for three million and the transfer of ownership of the restaurant.
The envelope contained the stuff dreams are made of yet the first thing I thought of when I received it was that he’s alive. I was more grateful for the contact in knowing he was alive than the contents of the envelope.
God knows I’d prefer to have him more than anything in this world.
Anything.
Irony has come to get me. I felt the restaurant would be the thing I accomplished.
The restaurant was the thing I wanted to focus on a few weeks back to fix me. Fix me after what happened with Gabe and set me back on track to my dreams. It was the thing I was choosing over the man because I thought being with the man who called me his babygirl and losing him would break me.
I took the risk and I’m broken just not in the way I thought I would be. I thought he would break my heart. I thought I would have lost him to heartbreak like Gabe.ConTEent bel0ngs to Nôv(e)lD/rama(.)Org .
I have a different type of heartbreak now where worry is making me sick, eating away at my insides and making me lose my mind wondering if Salvatore’s okay.
I have guards who are with me twenty four seven, the same as when I was with Salvatore but it’s not the same as him being here.
Gina comes into the living room with a mug of hot chocolate.
I’ve been curled up on the sofa since this morning. She got here an hour ago and has been taking care of me.
She sets the giant mug of hot chocolate down before me and smiles.
“This looked like it was in order. Something to cheer you up. I’ve put some mini pizzas in the oven and I’m baking later,” she says with a smile.
“Thank you. That sounds like you’re going to miss work again for me,” I answer. She was here all day yesterday.
“Yep that is pretty much what I have planned. You’ve been through a lot Mimi and I just want to be here for you, even if it’s just to make this,” she waves her hand over the cup and gives me a little smile.
“Thank you,” I say and swallow hard. I pick up the cup and take a sip. It brings a smile I don’t expect to my face. She’s made what I call her deluxe chocolate her grandmother taught her to make. The kind that’s more like melted chocolate with some cream. It does help a little.
Dad came by and has been dropping by daily with treats like I’m six years old. Chocolates and things you’d give a child. It’s sweet but since I know he didn’t want me with Salvatore before this happened I can’t quite see him as being genuine.
I hate too that he’s right. I hate that Salvatore is right.
Danger.
Everything points to that word. Everything and all that’s happened.
Danger.
“So, what are you going to do with your millions Miss Lady?” she asks, glancing at the envelope on the table.
I shake my head.
“Please don’t you dare tell me you won’t accept it,” she snaps, widening her eyes.
“I accept, but… only because it’s a gift from him. I haven’t actually thought about what it is. I know it’s a lot but since what I want is him I can’t think past that part.”
“I know sweetie. I know. He’s …right though. It’s too dangerous to be around any of the guys right now. My heart just goes out to Vincent… Jesus Mimi, when I think of what happened to Sorcha I just see the danger.”
I understand, I understand it all. I just don’t want it to be the way it is.
“It was so awful Gina. I’ve never seen Vincent like that before. Completely lost and hopeless. He didn’t want to believe it, or accept it.”
I haven’t seen or heard much about him since. I knew his mother was helping him so I assumed his father would be too. Helping both him and the baby.
I know what these guys are like though. Vincent may be truly broken now, he’s in shock. That’s what it is. The shock is the only thing that’s stopping him from going for blood the way he lost it when Frankie was killed. I remember well what it took to calm him down. I’m expecting to see that person very soon.
As for now, we’re in the interim stage. We’re in the eye of the storm waiting to see which way the wind will blow. Waiting to see what will happen next.
“Mimi… I think the best thing for you right now is to stay away. Salvatore is making it possible for you to live out your dream. You should do that.”
I pull in a deep breath and take it in. It’s all good advice. Yes my dream was to have the restaurant. That was the dream. Somewhere along the line though the dream shifted and it was a dream just to be with Salvatore.
That is what happened to me.
“Yeah, I will. I will. Once I get my feet on the ground I will.”
She sighs and gives my hand a gentle squeeze. “Good. Also… I don’t want to promise anything but the other day I managed to track down Porter. That’s the underground guy I was telling you about. Tony found him. I can set something up for you to talk to him, maybe that will keep your mind occupied.”
I stare at her and nod. Yes… that would keep my mind occupied indeed.
I lost track because of everything else but it’s time to turn my sights back to it. I do want to know what happened to my mother.
This may lead me nowhere, or it could give me some closure. Whatever it does it will heal some part of me that’s still raw from losing her.
“Okay, yes, I’d like that. I would like to speak to him. Definitely.”
Distraction is what I need now.
Doing something useful that might have a big result.
It beats sitting here and worrying.
Not doing anything but feeling sorrow for the situation.