[42] b
I had already thought about these steps and thoughts in case anything went wrong. I didn’t see it as a risk at all. I had already started to accept that this was the path I was going to take – with Cedric and the baby. It was more than enough for me.
I no longer thought about material things or economic imbalances. No, I had let go of that thought, and I don’t even remember when. In my mind, Cedric would surely fight for us, just like he said he would. I believed in him and his determination to make sure he wouldn’t be underestimated in his efforts.
But now?
Everything has vanished.
And I missed my Cedric the day before that fateful Saturday. Yes, I called it a fateful Saturday because it was the day when Cedric unmasked himself. Everything I had in mind about our future together with Cedric disappeared. It was overshadowed by disappointment and anger that enveloped me. Being deceived hurts.
“The bag,” he said, extending his hand towards me. I intentionally didn’t invite him in. I also had no intention of making him coffee, even though my heart wanted to. As I had been doing recently, I usually prepared breakfast, a cup of coffee, and a glass of milk for myself. We would eat together while having light and relaxed conversations. And I hoped for a compliment on how the coffee tasted. Cedric never forgot to give sweet compliments, never seemed excessive, and it always made me smile whenever I remembered it. It felt peaceful and happy, right?
I missed those times.
“No, sir. I can handle it myself.”
Cedric seemed disbelieving of my words, but I ignored it. I chose to lock the door immediately and walked ahead without caring about the man who was the same but different to me. I got ready to drive by myself. It was better than sitting in his expensive car again.
As the elevator descended to the basement, he followed, but I kept my distance. I didn’t want to get too close. First, his perfume still smelled the same. I couldn’t rule out the possibility that I would succumb to my emotions and throw myself at him again. If it were the previous Cedric, I might have done it. But this Cedric? I needed to think about it.
Second, he was now a stranger to me. That was enough reason for me to keep my distance. Let Naomi and Dona say I’m foolish, ungrateful, or unappreciative. It doesn’t matter. I had my own thoughts about this.
“Joice,” he called, but I refused to look at him. I walked closer to my car. As I was about to open the door, he stopped me. His body was so close that I could feel his breath on the top of my head. But honestly, I didn’t feel the same heartbeat I used to feel when Cedric was near. He felt like a stranger. A complete stranger.
“Joice, I know you’re still angry and disappointed with me.”
I tried to open the car door again.
“Don’t ignore me.”
“Sir, excuse me. I’m going to work. Please sit next to me or in the back. Your choice.”
“Joice.”
I turned around and gave him a sharp look. “Don’t make me use harsh words, sir.”
Cedric stepped back, giving me space to open the car door. But before my body could get inside, I felt like I was floating. When I realized, I was already in his arms.
“I’ll drive,” he said. I wanted to object, thinking of my stomach, but I stayed quiet, not wanting to gaze into his face that I had been openly observing these past few days.
“Have you had breakfast?”
I remained silent.Original from NôvelDrama.Org.
“Do you want some porridge at our usual place?” Cedric sat me down very gently, fastening my seatbelt and making sure I was comfortable. “Or carrot soup?”
I pouted, but my brain suddenly wanted what Cedric had just mentioned. A bowl of carrot soup with minced meat, still warm, and a cup of hot tea. Oh my! It must be delicious!
“I haven’t had breakfast yet, nor had my coffee, Joice. My sweetheart is angry today. It’s a pity, you know. Your smile is gone. You’re not friendly anymore. In fact, you seem ruder than usual.”
I didn’t care about his babbling. I just wanted the carrot soup he offered earlier. But instead of stopping, Cedric pulled my chin up so that he could look into my eyes. He didn’t know that I was very weak when those jet-black eyes stared at me intensely. They seemed to reach the depths of my soul. Until he realized that I might feel the same way? About the person who was before, not the one he is now.
A simple and straightforward person who was always reliable and could make me feel comfortable. What I knew was that he used to work as an office boy, not like now. Suddenly, his status was on par with Krystal, and I could clearly say that he was my boss. Would he still treat me the same way as before? As the one who introduced myself as an OB (Office Boy)? As the one he fell in love with because of my sincerity?
It seemed unlikely. He had power. More than I thought.
“I apologize,” he said again. I didn’t know how many times he had apologized since that fateful Saturday. He kept sending consecutive messages. I was still disappointed. I still couldn’t accept or imagine that… that we were different now.
“What do you want for breakfast, Joice? Don’t forget about the baby. He needs to eat.”
My clenched fists tightened even more. See? He only cares about his child. Not me. I had thought about this before, right? That Cedric only cared about me because I was pregnant, carrying his blood, so he showered me with attention to attract me. But he made me believe that it wasn’t just his child he wanted. He wanted me too.
Now?
No, a Cedric Blaxton only cares about his child. Not me. That’s right, isn’t it?