Mated To The King’s Gamma By Jessica Hall

Chapter 79

Abbie POV

I watched as he left. He really left. He walked out, and I glanced back at the bed nervously before looking back at the door. I hear him knock on Liam’s door down the hall and I move toward ours when I hear Liam’s voice.

“What’s up, brother?” I just managed to hear him say. I crack the door open just a little to listen. I knew it was coming but I thought I had more time, that maybe it wouldn’t hurt so much when it did. Yet hearing Gannon’s following words crushed me.

“I can’t do this with her anymore; I can’t. She is impossible. She-” he doesn’t finish, just sighs.

“Come on, let’s get a drink,” Liam says, wandering off with him. I shut the door, tears burning my eyes at what he said. Did he mean he didn’t want me? Did he finally realize I wasn’t enough for him, that couldn’t be what he needed?

My thoughts festered, racing through my head as I waited for him to return yet after an hour realized he wasn’t going to. Panic started to grow and writhed through me as I tried to calm my. racing heart and thoughts. Not wanting to wake Tyson, I slipped into the bathroom and sat on the floor. He was leaving me. He was going to leave me because, just like Sia, I was hurting him. I was no good for him, he deserved better. They all did!

Tyson deserved better. Tyson deserved a mother that wasn’t afraid of her own shadow, afraid of his father’s affections. Gannon needed a mate, something I could never truly be for him. I loved him, yet couldn’t do what was expected of me. I didn’t want to see the disappointment on his face when he realized I was tarnished, used, and ruined, and I didn’t want to endure the flashbacks that came with touch.

I felt dirty, felt gross as I stared at the tub. Maybe if I bathed, I would feel better, not so dirty, maybe could wash away the filthy parts of me, and Gannon wouldn’t notice them. So I ran a bath and hopped in

| scrubbed my skin yet no amount of scrubbing would remove the scars, remove the sense of their touch, remove what they did to me and what I was too weak to stop them from doing.

I was too weak to be the King’s Gamma’s mate, too vile and gross and now he saw that and nothing! did would fix it, he would leave me. Exclusive content © by Nô(v)el/Dr/ama.Org.

My actions or lack thereof were hurting him, breaking his heart as Sia did, just as my actions hurt Tandi that day and ruined her life. Just as I ruined Azalea’s because she suffered so much for me, she took more than her fair share of my punishments trying to protect me.

I was useless to all of them, always the burden and now I was seeing that with startling clarity, and that guilt was killing me, rotting me from the inside out as the tears refused to stop flowing when I spotted Gannon’s razor.

It was at that moment I realized I could fix everything. Everything would be fixed if I weren’t here Gannon would move on and find someone who could love him the way he deserved, and Tyson would have a new mother who would cherish and love him.

But most of all I would be set free, and they would be free of the burden that is me. So with that, I ran the razor down both arms. I didn’t feel it, I thought it would sting, but I felt nothing. Nothing at all yet the wounds closed too soon.

growl, cursing my stupidity before slashing and hacking at them again. Still, I healed, tears burned my eyes when I couldn’t even do that right. Getting out of the tub, I hunted around for something

sharper. I had to do this, had to set him free of me, and I know he would never give me up, even if that meant killing himself. I owed them all this, owed them for my failings.

I was sifting through his stash of knives when I found a bottle with a mushed plant in it. I shook it, trying to figure out what it was before popping the cap and sniffing it. I recognize the scent instantly as a smell from my grandmother’s house.

That creepy room she had that was off-limits. Wolfsbane. Taking the bottle, I wondered how much it would burn as I stepped back into the tub. The water had gone cold and I turned the hot water back on, leaving it on to heat the water as I built up the courage to put not only myself out of my misery but everyone whose lives I was ruining.

Sinking down into the water, I stared at the bottle in my hand before tipping it to my lips. I could fix it, I could make it go away and I could go away with it.

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