In Love With My Boyfriend’s Brother

I stare at him standing there in front of me. I clear my throat and say: “Wouldn’t it be better if you went and got dressed?” He looks at me for a moment, then says: “Why ? There’s nothing here you haven’t seen before.” I take the glass to my mouth and take a long sip of water, because I know there’s a lot of shit coming out of it.

He continues as he looks at me with an amused expression: “I mean, you hadn’t seen it yet, you just picked it up and …” I hold my breath as he moves a little closer, looking at me with a mischievous grin, and continues: “How did you get it?” And he rambles a bit more as he realizes that I don’t have much color in my face: “Usually women introduce themselves before they do that, and…” I interrupt him: “Yan, stop it, please !” He looks at me surprised, but without losing his smile.

I continue, but with a whisper: “You promised you were going to let it go.” “I said I would try.” I am about to say something more, but Cassie is leaving the room. I walk to the living room to meet her, Yan walks past me going over to her and giving her a quick kiss on the lips, and heading towards her room.

She says: “I’m sorry, Sky!” I just smile back and tell her it’s okay.

… Matt tells me that he had a serious talk with those two. They are in the living room now, while I finish washing some glasses that we had soda and pizza with earlier. Matt is looking at something on his cell phone sitting on the couch and the other is Yan and Cassie.

We haven’t spoken much since that incident. Yan looks in my direction and unluckily catches me looking at them. Somehow I know he’s enjoying seeing me annoyed, I can’t help it, but at the moment what’s making me like this is the fact that she has her hand on his arm and she’s stroking the part where “my drawing” is.

…

“A whole week, Matt?” “I’ll be back on Sunday. It’ll go by fast.” I whimper, and he comes over to me, kisses me quickly on the cheek, and goes back to get more shirts, while I put the ones that were already on the bed into the suitcase.

…

Matt traveled to the other side of the state yesterday to take care of some business at the company where he works.

I confess that I miss him a lot already. I’ve gotten used to leaving work and going straight to his apartment, even if it’s not so funny anymore after Yan and Cassie practically have sex while kissing everywhere.

…

Matt asks me to go to his apartment to pick up some things for Yan. I decide to go at a time when he is not there. We haven’t been the best of friends in the world these past few days.

I leave work a little early and go to the supermarket. I put some juices in the refrigerator and also some bread in a place where he can find it. But as soon as I look in the sink, there is a huge pile of glasses there. I start to wash them. It is unavoidable.

The door opens. Damn it! I should put this cleaning mania behind me. “Sky?” I feel a chill in my stomach as he pronounces my name. I turn around to find a surprised Yan seeing me here.

He looks different, but I don’t know-how.

I just say: “Oh, hi! Matt asked me to bring some things.” He kind of rolls his eyes. I don’t care, I know how he is.

He then points his eyes to the sink and says: “You don’t have to do that.”

I smile a little awkwardly and say: “I guess you can tell I have a cleaning mania, can’t you?” He smiles wryly.

I turn to the sink and to relax, continue: “And Cassie’s not a big fan of washing glasses.” I look at him to see his reaction, but he doesn’t laugh, he just says: “We broke up yesterday.” I swear I didn’t see that one coming.

I look at him and ignoring my heart beating strangely inside my chest, I ask: “Are you okay?” He just looks at me for a while, then says yes and turns to go to his room.

I finish washing the glasses, but my thoughts are behind that door there that I can’t stop staring at.

Should I go over there and ask if he is okay? I end up telling myself that I shouldn’t do that and go home as soon as I’m done.

I wish.Text property © Nôvel(D)ra/ma.Org.

I want to get home and not be so euphoric about everything Yan told me earlier.

Matt calls me right after I prepare dinner and I tell him, but he says that Yan will be fine.

… It’s Wednesday afternoon and as soon as I get off work, I decide to change my route home and now I’m here in front of Matt’s apartment door, I have to make sure that Yan is okay.

After hesitating for a moment, I knock on the door and it opens. He seems surprised to see me here. I’m not sure what I’m doing here either, so still standing outside the door, I just say: “Hi.” He quickly replies: “Hi.” He looks better to me. I then say: “I just came by to see how you were doing and if you wanted to talk.” He seems to like the idea and as he is about to answer, I hear a female voice from inside.

Yan, did you run out of orange juice?

And a blonde woman wearing a short hobby appears from inside the kitchen. He looks half-unpleasantly at the floor, then answers her: “I think so.” She sees me and comes over to him and asks suspiciously with a fake smile: “Who is she?” “My brother’s girlfriend.” She says it’s nice to meet me and I also say in the same ironic tone she used.

She goes back inside and I just say to Yan: “I think you’re in very good company, I’ll be right there.” I don’t even look back to see his reaction. Dumb, dumb, dumb! I repeat mentally several times while I am in the cab back to my apartment. How could I have been so stupid as to think that he would be ill and alone?

…

Matt laughs on the phone as he hears me telling him how Yan is reacting to his breakup with Cassie. “He’s just like that, Sky.” “But I don’t know Matt. He should at least…” But I don’t even know what I think about all this.

He laughs again.

…

As soon as I get back home after leaving after dinner to take a walk around the block, the doorman stops me and says: “A boy was here to looking for you!” I look at him curiously and he continues: “He said he is your boyfriend’s brother.” I am really surprised, it wasn’t that long ago that I left him there with that snobby blonde in their apartment. I thank Paul the condo doorman and move on.

I try not to think about why Yan came all this way to look for me and try to get some sleep.

…

Today is Friday. I decide to forget what happened and go on with my life without thinking that Yan exists and did you know that it has been the best thing I have ever done since he moved here?

…

As soon as I leave work, a colleague texts me that she is coming home tomorrow to pick up that folder I said I would lend her.

As I finish answering Okay, I remember that this folder is in Matt’s room.

I have to go there and guess what? Yan is probably home from work by now.

I whimper.

…

I walk up to the front door of the apartment. I have the keys here, but I decide to knock first. I won’t run the risk of disturbing him again like I did that day.

I knock on the door, which he promptly opens and greets me with a smile, and I hate to admit to myself that I missed that smile.

So I just greet him dryly back and say: “I need to get a folder from Matt’s room.” He just keeps smiling in that sexy way, as he makes room for me to walk past him and into the room. He crosses his arms and looks at me. I stop a few steps ahead and question him: “What?” He just raises his eyebrows, still smiling as if I am amusing him, and answers: “Nothing.”

I turn and walk towards Matt’s room.

I walk in and close the door and say to myself: “Oh, he is so frustrating!”