I’m Just His Wife

“Didn’t it mean it? Really?” I pointed at Lara and looked from head to toe. “Laren, wake up. I think every fiber of her personality was covered with greed and evil. Don’t cover it up because the stench of this woman was already out.”

“No … She’s not in the right frame of mind, you know that …” Laren continued to cry while looking at Lara.

“She’s not in the right frame of mind but …” I swallowed and held back my tears. “He’s too much, Laren. He used to aggravate me but I just didn’t move. And … Now he’s the one telling you things. You’re my friend, Ren. I don’t think he’s doing it right …” I shook.

I pulled Laren’s arm and we walked away. Lara doesn’t deserve my forgiveness. He was too tough. I don’t like what he did before. He will not receive my forgiveness until he changes.

“I’m sorry …”

Laren and I almost stopped walking when Lara spoke. I turned to Laren and he turned to me right away.

“I’m sorry for stealing Ivan away from you. I’m sorry for the hurtful words that I’ve told you. I’m sorry for tearing you and Ivan apart …” he began. “I don’t … I don’t know what I was doing then. All I know was that I want to fight Ivan because I love him. I was able to snatch him from you because … I love him so much. He was the first and last. man I love. ”

None of my own sighed and cried. I know that. That he loved Ivan so much that he did all that. But … why am I hurting now? Why does it hurt to hear that he loves my wife?

“I loved Seymour, too, but Ivan was an exception. My love for him was stronger than for Seymour. He has made me happy for so many years that I am sad and full of envy. I am very jealous of Ate Laren because he can do everything he wants without any complaints from our parents but I … “he sobbed which made my heart hurt even more. I didn’t even look at him. “It’s always forbidden because of my illness. I’m not allowed to go like this, I’m not allowed to go with that. But Ivan … He helped me do the taboos. He made me enjoy the fun that I didn’t experience before because of being incarcerated I’m on my parents’ railing … ”

Laren turned to face Lara but I remained turned away. Ivan made her happy and I was jealous of her because that”s what my husband hadn’t done to me. He never made me happy for a long time.

“But Mom and Dad were just doing the right thing, Lara. And most of all why were you jealous of me? Yes and I can do what I want to do but our parents don’t pay attention to me because they were focused on you. So am I. you should be jealous, Lara … “Laren’s voice was still sad for the deceased.

“But, Ate, I don’t want that! All I want was to be free. And Ivan, he was the person who used to be with me during the times when I wanted to discover different things. He accompanied me to travel places. that I couldn’t travel then … “Lara stopped for a moment. “But then, I met Seymour. While Ivan and I were then we were also Seymour. We had a conflict and Seymour was the one who became my refuge. He got me pregnant and … we got married …”

The more I couldn’t speak to what he said. That’s right. Whatever I do avoiding knowing everything I can’t do because I”m connected to it. I am connected because the person I love was the end of that connection as well as my best friend.

“Ate, please take care of Celine, Paul and Troy. Take care of my children that I have never done before. Also tell them that … when I return I will be a good mother to them. And please do tell them, too , that I’m sorry and that I love them so much … “Lara told Laren. “And, Rigella …” he called me so I came face to face with him. I was so blurred with tears but I could see his smile on me.

“I’m really sorry. Ivan and you were going to have another baby …” he looked at my stomach and looked at my face again. “I hope you’ll forgive me for what I’ve done. Tell Ivan, too, that I’m sorry. I was still forcing myself on him even though he didn’t want to, he told me. I even made Troy his son just so he could be mine. … ”

“But, expect me not to disturb you again. I also heard what happened to him. I wish … I wish I could visit him but I know, I can’t.” she smiled and wiped away her tears. “I wish you will be happy this time, Rigella. You deserve to be happy because you have experienced many hardships and … you were a good person. I hope you will forgive me for everything I have done …”

I just smiled and nodded at him. Gradually I knew I was forgiving Lara. Even though I didn’t go to him here I knew the anger I had for him was gone. Because I have never been able to be angry with someone for a long time.

“Ate, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean what I said before. But …” Lara approached Laren and hugged her Ate. “I love you so much. Thank you for the sacrifices you made for me. I know it can’t be matched by just gratitude but thank you anyway. Expect me to change. That I will recover from my illness, Ate …”

After that conversation Laren and I both came out of that building and both had puffy eyes. That was one of the painful yet contented event of my life. I have no regrets that I talked to Lara because a large part of the pain in my heart was eased when I talked to her.

Not everything has been perfect in my life but I have no regrets. I am still proud that all that happened to me because it strengthened my heart and my faith in Him.

We headed straight to a restaurant using Laren’s car. We’re not with Roxanne and Darlyn right now because Laren and I still feel a little annoyed with them. What they did was not justified. That was not humane.

I ordered a large plate of carbonara and an iced tea. I was hungry the moment we talked that. Baby and I were both hungry. Laren, on the other hand, only ordered soup and a glass of water because he was still full.

When our orders arrived we ate immediately. Carbonara was really what I’ve been craving these past few days so it’s appetizing to eat now.

“How’s Alex? Where’s your husband?” I asked him after I chewed the carbonara I cooked. I wiped my soiled mouth with a table napkin.

Laren took a sip of water before answering. “Ah, okay. It’s okay. He’s at a business conference today and he’s coming home tomorrow. That’s why I’m free to roam now.”

“Why, your husband seems to be too possessive and doesn’t want to let you out.” I laughed saying.

Laren grinned and shook his head. “He just doesn’t want to repeat what happened to me. You know, I was raped.” Laren’s face was a little sad but I knew that her rape was gone. How many times did he consult a doctor then e.

“But your luck with Alex, what? He accepted you completely even though he knew what happened to you. He really loves you …” I smiled suddenly. It’s nice to feel like you’re still loved by someone despite your flaws.

Laren nodded and laughed softly. “You’re right there. That’s why I love him so much …” I could clearly see the redness on both of Ren’s cheeks.

I just sucked. I won’t admit it but I know I’m jealous of him. The eyes of the person he loves were alive and wide open but I … Tsk. No more e. I don’t know how I can be with him anymore …

“But, Drea, you were luckier than me …” Ren said suddenly so I stopped sniffing. “Ivan loved you for years. For most of his life he only loved you. He’s a good catch, you know. Apart from being handsome, loving and sweet, he was able to risk his life just to save you. .. “Laren smiled and sipped the soup.

I was stunned by him but one of my hands was able to move and take my iced tea. I took a deep breath there and thought. Laren was right. Ivan was a good catch. Many women ask for that kind of man like her but … to an imperfect woman like me God gave her.

We’re really destined for each other, I know that. And otherwise I will block things that will destroy us again. Because I wish until the end we still were. I don’t want anything else to break down and ruin our love.

‘the amount of adjectives you’re describing to my wife. Admit it to me, Ren, do you still like Ivan?” biro ko. I even frowned pretending.

“Ay, gaga!” he said laughing. “Yes and I liked Ivan then. I even loved him. But that was then, Andrea. Then, okay? That was before, what were you.”

“Many of you like Ivan.” I’m really frustrated. “He ignored you all before but I never …”

‘that wife of yours was stupid, Drea …” Ren said shaking his head. “And of course, he was stuck in his friendship with Seymour and in his love for you. You really won’t be ignored then because he’s still confused. And one more …” Laren grinned as if suppressing a laugh.

“And one more, what?” I sniffed slightly.

“And one more …” he laughed. “You were the one who got married and gave birth so don’t frown at that. Of all the women who liked Ivan, you were the only one who tasted him …” he laughed.

My eyes rolled. “Ren, you’re rude!” I’m worried about him. She’s already infected with Darlyn!

‘tell me, Drea. was he good in bed? was it delicious? was he aggressive?” he asked one question after another and suddenly laughed again. I covered my ears. I don’t want to talk about those things! “And … was it big?” she bit her lower lip after she asked me that question. His suppression of laughter was obvious.

“Oh, shut up!” I shouted at him. Siyaw laughed again and continued eating.

Oh, crap. Does he really need to ask me those kinds of questions? That’s private!

My cheeks warmed when I remembered something. I remembered our intimate nights together! Hayst, I”m already infected with their green mindedness!

I just shook and exhaled. I shouldn’t have thought of that, heck!

We were currently in front of a police station today. Actually, I was still hesitant whether I would come here or not but … I decided to go because my mood was not calm. I have many questions that need to be answered.

“You know, Ren.” I smiled sadly and looked at the police station sign again. “I never imagined it. You’re the type I’m going to visit him at a precinct.” I saw out of the corner of my eye Ren looking at me. “She’s very kind. It’s a sin for me to think about such an incident.” I grinned bitterly and bowed.

I forgot what Mommy told me then. That even the kindest person in the world makes mistakes too. No human was as perfect. Everything has its own flaws. It has its own flaws.Contentt bel0ngs to N0ve/lDrâ/ma.O(r)g!

I don’t know what I would call those things that happened to me. Whether punishment or trial? But I don’t care about you anymore because it has already happened. No more, I can’t change everything.

“Shall we continue, Drea?” Laren asked so I looked at him. “Looks like you can’t. We’ll just talk to him someday.” he smiled softly.