Novel Square
28
“Can you please explain this to me?” Karen was saying. “You had the best night of your life with a dreamboat of a man who could give lessons to the god of love, and you told him you never wanted to see him again…. or fuck him again… Whichever way you want to put it… Does that sum it up?”
Emma, Karen and Monica were at Monica’s food truck. They were taking a break after shopping for dresses for the wedding. Emma had just told them what happened between her and Daniel.
Emma cast a quick glance around the quiet truck. “Could you please keep it down, you idiot”. She glared at Karen, who was impeccably dressed, perfectly groomed, not an ash-blond hair out of place. And looking every bit as put-together as Emma felt torn apart.
“Yes. That sums it up very well.” Emma said
Karen rolled her eyes, entirely unrepentant.
“What do you think, Monica?” Emma asked, “As you can see it is useless talking to Karen about stuff like this”
Monica laughed. “I’m sorry,” she said. “But I think I’m on Karen’s side to be honest.”
“You too?” Emma said, like she couldn’t believe what she had just heard. “So you think I made a mistake too?”
“Yes.” Monica continued. “Look babe, I don’t know what to tell you. But you shouldn’t have pushed him away like that. Damn, that was harsh. I wonder how he must have felt, spending such an amazing night with you and then waking up to you giving him the cold shoulder. He must have left asking himself what he did wrong… Might even be asking himself if maybe he didn’t do something right in bed ”
Emma sighed.”Oh he isn’t worried about that. The guy is super confident in this super annoying way. And I gave him a good reason ” she said
“That you can’t be together because you work together is not a good reason… Especially when you are lying about it” Karen said, rolling her eyes again
“Okay, shut up” Emma said making Monica laugh again
“I’m not lying. That we work together is a perfectly good reason not to be together. It could affect our work. And Barrett isn’t going to be happy about it. It’s not professional”
“You know what, Emma?” Monica said. “I don’t think it’s your job that you are worried about here. I think you are just scared. And I get it. But you have to let go, honey. You have to try to be happy with another guy. And you won’t be able to be happy until you let go of these ridiculous boundaries and just let things happen for you. ”
” They are not ridiculous boundaries. I like to think of them as principles. They keep me safe from getting hurt. I don’t want to make any stupid mistakes ”
” blah blah blah ” Karen said and Emma gave her one of her looks.
“But you want him.” Monica said. “You know you do… So why are you putting yourself through all this torture?”
“You tell her girl,” Karen said. She reached into her purse and retrieved a cigarette case.
“You are just too uptight”.
“Uh, Karen,” Monica said. Put that thing away, you cannot smoke here.”
Karen audibly growled, but put the case away, grumbling.”Can’t smoke around Frank, can’t smoke around you either” Then she snapped her long, red-tinted nails against the pristine white tablecloth, tapping out a beat in visible irritation. “Tell me why not” she said
“Why can’t you smoke?” Monica replied. “Urrrm… Aside from it being horribly unhealthy, and,…”
“Why can’t you just be with him?” Karen growled, not fooled one bit. And getting back to the topic. “He really wants you”
“I already told you,” Emma said. “I’m doing what is best for me. He just wants sex”
“So… What is wrong with that?” Monica asked
Emma stared at her. “What is wrong with that?” she repeated. “well…. I think I like him already… Actually I like him a lot. And if I keep sleeping with him, I will end up falling in love with him. He has made it clear he just wants to fuck me. So what happens when he is tired of that? I can’t stand seeing him. Things get complicated at work. I just leave… Hurt.. Again?… I can’t put myself through all that… Not anymore ”
Monica nodded. She understood.
Emma was a strong woman, but she was not that strong. She had already developed feelings for Daniel in the brief time they had spent together. Even if she claimed they were just friendly feelings right now but with those friendly feelings, it still horrified her to think of him leaving her or hurting her.
How much worse it might be if she continued to see him, she couldn’t imagine. Which was why she was so certain she had made the right decision in sending him away.
Even if she had been regretting it ever since. Her mind had been one hundred percent responsible for the plan. But her body was still pretty unhappy about it.
“But have you thought about it this way?” Monica said. “Maybe he won’t hurt you… If you give him a chance. I can’t help but remember the way he helped us serve the customers the other day. It was such a nice thing to do… You know. And he didn’t have to do it. I think he just wanted to spend time with you, Emma.”
“Don’t be ridiculous.” Emma said. “You should see the way he flirts. He is really good at it. I mean it, he is really good. So good that when he does it, I have to resist the urge to beg him to bend me over and just take me right there and then.”
“Wow”. Karen said.Content (C) Nôv/elDra/ma.Org.
Emma ignored her and continued. “It freaks me out. Just how attracted to him I am. He made it clear to me that he just wanted to have sex. Well, we had sex. We got it over with. It was just a fling. The only reason he was trying to hang around was because he just wanted more sex.. I’m not going to stick around till he gets tired of me. I miss him though. He hasn’t reached out to me and it has already been a week..”
“Funny how you are here wondering why he hasn’t called when you are the one who told him not to.” Karen said. She pursed her lips slightly, then lifted her hand and rubbed her chin. Emma recognized the look.
“No to whatever scheme you have come up with.” she said.
Karen laughed.” Chill girl, I was just going to suggest that… ”
” I don’t want to hear it,” Emma said. “You know what, let’s talk about something else… Or someone else”.
“fine”.
But Emma kept thinking about what they said. Had she made a mistake?