For The Stars Have Sinned

Scandalous fan



“W-What?” I blinked. “Are you that author… CareLikeGoldFish?”

I held my breath when he nodded and smiled at me.

Right at that moment, it dawned on me why I was fascinated with his works. Those were the scenes I saw in Boljoon two months ago. He wrote what he did in that terrible night. I should distance myself because I know it’s wrong to still idolize him after what he did to Ariel, but the more I know him, the more I am drawn towards him.

Just like a moth drawn to a flame.

He stepped closer to me. A gentle smile was still hanging on his lips. “You’re beautiful tonight, Rish.”

It took me seconds before I find my voice again. “Thank y-you,” I whispered under my breath. He chuckled when he saw me speechless.

I can’t look away from his eyes. It was enchanting and the more I stared at him, the more my heart beat wildly. Just as I was drowning in his eyes, someone cleared a throat. Like a broken glass, I woke up from my stupor. I was confused. What’s happening?

I looked past Levi and saw Lyndon. He was standing in the dark but because of the moonlight I could see his serious expression. “Lyndon?” I asked, confused and lost. “What are you doing here?”

“That should be my question, Rishel. What are you doing in this place, alone with a man of mysterious origin?” he asked and stepped closer to me. He pulled me behind him and faced Levi.

Levi was still smiling when the two faced each other. That’s when I remembered why I came here but Lyndon was here. It’s not good to bicker with him in front of my idol. So I handed my little gift to Levi. “My gift for you,” I said.

He looked down at the small gift box I held. “Thank you, Rish,” he said and accepted it.

I felt Lyndon’s hold on my wrist tightened but I didn’t mind it. I pulled him away. While walking away, I turned back to the veranda and waved at Levi.

After that night, Levi and I always chat using his CareLikeGoldFish account. Our topic was about his works. He admitted that The Last Resort, his popular work, was not entirely fictional.

I knew. I was there when he killed Ariel but I didn’t tell him that I am a witness.

I’m afraid that if I tell the truth, he will avoid me. I know what I did was not good and I know it was against my conscience to hide the truth but wasn’t Ariel alive and kicking?

I don’t even know what happened after what Levi did but seeing Ariel alive made me shut my mouth, for Vine’s reputation and for Levi’s sake. But sometimes, my conscience urged me to admit what I saw in that night. Especially since Lyndon would occasionally ask me what I know of that crime and reading The Last Resort was just an overkill to my conscience.

But reading Levi’s sweet reply, I throw away the whisper of conscience at the back of my mind.

“Are you that desperate to show that your idol noticed you?” Jamaica asked.

I put down the phone and at glared at her. I was currently eating in the canteen and some of the freshmen approached me to ask for a picture. Seeing that I was popular, Jamaica came to me and said those words.

Why did I become famous in campus recently?

Because Levi posted using his writer account. He talked about me, his loyal reader, and he declared that we are friends. My account was tagged on the reading site and since I can’t hide my account some die hard fans of CareLikeGoldFish knew it was me.

They were eager to make friends with me and some asked who CareLikeGoldFish was in real life. I didn’t let them know that he’s Levi and just reasoned that the writer didn’t want to let his true personality be known.

Their eyes were envious but they didn’t dare to mess with me. This is the feeling of being famous. I was immersing myself in their both envy and admiration when Jamaica came into the scene.

“What? Are you jealous?” I asked her, grinning which made her scorn.

“You really think that I envy you?” she said, annoyed. “I don’t and I won’t. I don’t care about your idols nor even care if they notice you.” She smirked. “You’re like a beggar eager for their attention. Why would I envy you?”

I pursed my lips. I raised an eyebrow at what she said. “If you’re not envious, then why are you so agitated? Don’t tell me you’re secretly fangirling them?” I shook my head. “Give up. You’re not special like me so they won’t notice a small fly like you.”

Jamaica’s face darkened at what I words and I couldn’t help but rejoice inside. Bingo. I hit the mark, didn’t I? So she’s fangirling in secret?

“You’re a waste like your idols! Wasting time and resources to fangirl.” She grimaced. “Cheap and good-for-nothing idols! Look at you, you’re nothing but a cheap attention seeker. Your idol’s Vine? Heh. That boyband is nothing but a pig that wants to become a star. A loser fan and a loser Vine! What a perfect combination!”

I could see her deep hatred and disdain towards Vine. Clenching my fist, I stood and quickly reached for her hair, tugging it violently. She gasped. I also felt her holding my hair and pulling it away from my scalp. My teeth clenched tightly as my scalp went numb.

“Don’t you dare —” I violently pulled her hair and slapped her cheek. ” — insult my idol!”

Jamaica fell on the floor. She looked up at me and glared. “People like you are toxic!”

I was about to hit her again when she blocked her face with her arm. Hah, pathetic. I took a deep breath and stood up straight. “That should be your lesson!” I said combing my messy hair with my fingers.

“Jamaica!”

I looked at Generica who was running towards us. The girl attended Jamaica.

Looking around, I realized there were eyes looking at me and Jamaica. They’re holding phones capturing the scene and I knew they had recorded what happened earlier.

My eyes squinted. “Don’t come to me again asking for CareLikeGoldFish fansign if you plan to post that video in social media! If you do, I’ll let him deal with you!”

The students looked at each other and put down their phones. But there were some who continued recording me. I glared at them but they just grinned back at me and waved. Then they laughed to each other.

Nah. I couldn’t convince all of them since some are not fond of reading novels so they won’t know how famous CareLikeGoldFish is. So I cleared my throat and declared, “Vine will not be happy if you post these things in social media. They warned us back then not to make scenes in public staining their image! Did you get my point?”

“Who cares about Vine? Miss, please stop blabbering and get lost!” a boy shouted and laughed with his group of friends.

My cheeks burned hot in embarrassment especially when Jamaica laughed together with those guys. I glared at her one last time before exiting the canteen, hoping that those students would be decent enough not to publish those videos in social media. I didn’t want to go viral because of a scandal!

Sighing, I checked my wristwatch. But three girls blocked my way to Education building.

They looked at my face and looked down at the cellphone in their hands. Suddenly, a woman on the right screamed. “Girls! That’s her!”

Then they started giggling to each other. I frowned. What’s wrong with them? They fell silent when they saw my expression. “Do you girls need anything?” I asked.

“Hi, I’m Avien. I’m a fan of CareLikeGoldFish. Sister, is it true that he met you?”

I was at lost of words for a moment before I realized that they’re fangirls of CLGF. One of the disadvantages of being famous is that everyone me yet I don’t know them. That feeling was kind of overwhelming.All text © NôvelD(r)a'ma.Org.

“Sis, look.” She showed me the phone. I frowned. “The screenshot of your post went viral on Facebook. We searched your profile and found out that you are studying here.”

One of her companions laughed. “Yes. I stalked your account. But is it true? Do you know the author in person?”

“Have you read his post?” I asked. “He answered your questions in his post. If you haven’t, check it out again.”

They giggled again and I looked away. I didn’t expect them to find me here on the school ground when there’s a lot of students walking to and fro, meeting different faces everyday.

“Sister, give it to him. Then please ask him a fansign for me.”

“Yes, te. I promise, I’ll give you a tip.”

“Oh, girl. You’re lucky. He noticed your messages while he doesn’t seem to see my messages!” one girl complained. “But give this to him and make sure I’ll get a fansign in return!”

I looked at what they were handing to me. Sighing, I accepted those paperbags and bid goodbye. They have a lot of follow-up instructions where to send the autographs and I just shook my head though I completely understand them.

Since I was checking the insides of the paperbags, I didn’t notice someone blocking my way and I hit something hard. Fortunately, I was quick to tighten my hold on the paperbags so it didn’t fell.

I looked up and saw Tiden. Eh? What is he doing here?


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