Chapter 3
“Are you sure you don’t want me to drive?” I asked with a yawn after waking up from my tenth nap of the journey so far.
“No, don’t worry. I’m fine.”
“We should stop somewhere. You need a break.”
“We’ll arrive in less than 3 hours.”
“Even for a coffee, Luca? You look exhausted and if you fall asleep behind the wheel we might both die,” I said. “And personally, I don’t find the concept of that particularly attractive.”
“Fine. You can drive but if I fall asleep, follow signs to the border and wake me up like half an hour before we get there,” he said driving into a lay-by. “Promise me?”
“Sure, whatever.”
He was wearing a serious expression which considering Luca was the subject in question, unnerved me.
“No, not ‘sure, whatever’. You have to wake me up,” he said looking into my eyes. “It’s important.”
I nodded and looked away from him. There was a few moments of silence before he opened the car door and got out.
I did the same and was surprised when I was hit by an entourage of hot air. It clung uncomfortably to my skin and instantly made my throat dry.
“Where the fuck are we?” I asked. “It’s so warm.”
“You don’t get out of Washington enough Els,” he replied.
“Remember how I recently got kidnapped and taken to Canada?” I asked looking up at the clear starry sky.
There wasn’t a light for miles around. Well, there wasn’t anything for miles around. We looked to be in the middle of a barren desert with nothing but gritty sand and cacti for company.
“Isn’t the sky pretty?” I said letting out a deep sigh.
“I guess it is.”
We stood for a few moments leaning against the car in total silence before Luca stood up straight.
“I need a piss,” He announced destroying the peace.
“Can’t appreciate the beauty of nature for long with you around, can you?” I grumbled as he walked to the edge of the road.
“Ella?” Luca said as I tried my hardest not to listen to his urine hit the sand.
“Yes, my darling.”
“How do girls pee if there’s no toilet to sit on?” he asked.
“With great difficulty,” I replied. “What made you ask such an odd question? Except for the fact that you are Luca or course…”
“I saw these things on the internet… I think it’s called a femme-pee or something like that and it’s basically a funnel that girls can pee down so it’s like they have a dick,” Luca replied as he continued to urinate.NôvelDrama.Org © content.
“The internet is a dark place.”
“I’m glad I have a built-in straw to piss through,” he said.
“Thank you, Luca, for that slightly uncomfortable description of your penis,” I said with a grimace. “And are you done? How much liquid can you possibly store in your bladder.
“I had a lot to drink.”
“I can see- uh- hear that.”
“Okay done.”
For the next two and a half hours I drove. Luca fell asleep instantly and didn’t wake up until I shook him after seeing signs for the border saying only 5 miles away.
“We’re five miles away,” I said as he slowly sat up and groaned.
“Five miles?!” He exclaimed. “You were meant to wake me up way earlier than this. I told you, didn’t I? I made it very clear.”
“I’m sorry,” I said a little confused. “What’s the problem?”
“Stop the car. We need to swap back,” he said. “Now. Now. Now.”
“Okay!”
The road was completely clear so I ground the car to a halt and undid my seat belt. I was about to open the car door and walk around but Luca had other ideas.
“Just climb across,” he said pulling me back and climbing over to the driver’s seat with his large body.
“Just??” I asked as he began to move to the other side of the car with as much elegance as a dying swan.
“Come on. We don’t have time to fuck about!” he said
“There is not enough space for this,” I said trying to squeeze around him to the passenger’s seat. “Walking around would have been far easier,” I added. “And your ass is in my face.”
“Your ass is in my face,” he said trying to get his incredibly long legs over.
“Not my fault that Daddy long legs over here is taking up all the room,” I said as I decided the best route would be to slither over the dashboard to the passenger seat.
I finally got to it and began doing up my seatbelt before hearing an abrupt laugh from the driver’s seat.
“What?” I asked.
“It’s just…” he said with another giggle. “You looked like a snakish seal as you slid over the dashboard.”
“And you looked like an obese giraffe,” I remarked.
There was then an awkward pause for a few moments as Luca restarted the car.
“That was uncalled for,” he replied quietly.
“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean it. You aren’t obese you’re just strong,” I answered slapping his hard as rock chest.
Ow, that hurt my hand.
“Luca what the fuck!” I screamed out of shock as he suddenly diverged off the road and downhill across the sand.
“Relax… we’re going the back way,” Luca replied.
“The fucking back way!?” I exclaimed. “We’re entering a country, not a party!” I added as the sight of the road faded away. “This is illegal.”