Find Me Alastar

I narrow my eyes as I force the words from my lips. “I shouldn’t have kissed you last week.”

She frowns as her eyes search mine again. “Oh.”

We stand in silence; the tinge of regret hangs heavily between us.

“I’ve been thinking.” She fumbles around with her hand. “If you wanted the ring for your

mother, maybe I shouldn’t have taken it from you, and I shouldn’t have made fun of your name. It

wasn’t very nice of me.”

My heart freefalls as she holds her ring out to me.

What?

“I keep going over our conversation in the shop that day and you said that you had wanted the

ring for your mother for a long time,” she tells me softly.

I stare at the precious ring in her outstretched hand.

She shakes her head. “And I can’t have that on my conscience, knowing how badly you wantedPublished by Nôv'elD/rama.Org.

it.”

“You don’t like it?” I breathe as a cluster-fuck of emotions start to run rampant through my

mind.

“I love it. It’s the most precious thing I think I have ever owned.”

“Why, then?” I breathe.

I should be excited, instead I feel let down.

Shut up and take it!

She steps toward me, picks up my hand, and places the ring in my palm as she gently kisses my

cheek. My arms immediately curl around her waist and I hold her close to me, inhaling her scent one

last time.

She looks up at me with that kiss me look she does so well.

I want this woman.

One night.

What harm could one night do?

No.

Stop it.

“My name is Alastar,” I breathe into her hair. She smiles at me dreamily. I lift her hand and

place the ring back on her finger. “And this is your ring,” I whisper. “It belongs with you.”

“But what if it belongs with you?” she asks, squeezing my hand in hers.

“I have no doubt it does,” I whisper with regret.

End this now. I step back from her and her face falls as her eyes search mine again.

“Don’t look at me like that,” I murmur.

“Like what?”

“Like you are disappointed with me.”

“I was just hoping…” She stops midsentence.

“Hoping what?”

“That you were going to kiss me again.”

“You are here with your boyfriend.” I snap.

Her face falls. “He’s… not my boyfriend.”

“You told me he was.”

“I lied. I’d only just met him that day.”

My gaze holds hers for an extended moment.

One night, I just want one night.

No.

“That’s good to know.” I step back from her, too tempted to stick around. “I have to go.

Goodbye.” I nod.

She stands and watches me but remains silent while I turn and begrudgingly walk away.

It’s 11pm and I am in bed on my laptop, stalking the divine Miss Mathew’s Facebook page.

It’s nothing new. I have done the same thing every night since our impromptu kiss last week.

I’m not allowing myself to involve her in this, and I can’t believe I rejected the ring.

That was the plan. The whole plan was to get the ring, and yet when she offered it to me, I

couldn’t take it from her.

I smile. What a sweetheart to offer it to me when I know how much she loves it. The rain pours

down outside. I close my computer and turn off my lamp to lay on my back and stare up at the

ceiling.

I feel flat.

I need to pick up my game.

This isn’t how it was supposed to go.

My phone beeps, alerting me to a text, and I frown. Who would be texting me at this time of

night? I sit up and retrieve my phone from my side table. Emerson.

I’m thinking about you, Alastar

Goodnight.

x

Shit.