Filthy Secret

SAWYER STOOD behind the bar at the Crooked Angel and let his grin have its way with him. Not that it was a tough battle. Four days had passed since the night that had ended with him in Jo’s bed, four mornings that he’d woken up in her arms. She’d adjusted her audition prep schedule to fit around his hours at the Crooked Angel, and they’d spent every non-working minute together, only taking breaks from their trips around the city and long conversations so she could FaceTime with her daughter. Sawyer had heard so many stories about Mikayla that he felt like he knew her. Although they hadn’t crossed that particular bridge just yet, he’d be ready when Jo was. Mikayla was the center of Jo’s world. Sawyer might not have a clue about kids, but that didn’t mean he couldn’t figure it out.

Damn, he was falling for her. And as crazy as that was, it didn’t feel

crazy at all.

It felt like living.

“Uh-oh. Look out,” came a voice Sawyer knew all too well, but not even the cocky smirk that went with it could put a dent in his bulletproof mood.

“Don’t you have a photo shoot to get to, superstar?” he asked Finn, matching his friend’s smirk as he reached into the beer cooler at his hip for Finn’s usual IPA.

Finn rolled his eyes, but kept his smile in place. He’d probably been getting a raft of shit from his teammates for the high-profile underwear ad that had appeared in select magazines this week. Not that it was going to keep Sawyer from joining in, because Finn in a pair of expensive-ass skivvies in front of God and everybody? That shit was priceless.

“Don’t hate, Knox. The twins need college money, you know. Anyway, don’t think for a second that you’re going to distract me from calling out that look on your face.”

Funny, Sawyer didn’t lose his smile, either. “What look?” he asked, popping the cap off Finn’s beer and sliding it over the bar in a well- practiced move.

“The goofy grin that appears every time you sneak a look at a certain pretty brunette sitting next to her sister over by the door. For the record, you may be half-gone for her, but you’re not stealthy.”

Sawyer’s pulse tripped in his veins. Having feelings for Jo was one thing. Other people being able to tell just by looking at him? Definitely another. “Jo and I are enjoying the time we have together,” he said, swiping at a spot on the bar with a towel even though he could practically see his reflection in the surface.

“But?” Finn asked. His expression grew serious, his dark brows tugging downward in concern, and shit. Sawyer just wasn’t good at holding anything back.

“The ‘but’ isn’t on my end. I do really like her, probably more than I should after only two weeks.”Belonging © NôvelDram/a.Org.

Finn waved a hand in dismissal, although not rudely. “I’m a firm believer in ‘when you know, you know,'” he said. “You might be taking it faster than usual, but if you like her that much, is it really such a bad thing?”

Sawyer shook his head, slipping a gaze across the bar at Jo. She looked beautiful, her dark-brown hair framing her face in soft waves as she laughed at something Maxwell said, her bright red sweater and jeans hugging every curve. “No. I don’t know.” Shit. “Maybe.”

“Really? Because she’s clearly into you, too,” Finn said, thoughtfully sipping his beer. “I mean, goofy look on your face aside, you two have been practically joined at the hip the whole time she’s been in Remington.”

Shock lifted Sawyer’s brows. “Who told you that?”

Finn snorted. “Please. Jo tells Frankie, who tells Isabella, who tells Kellan, who tells January, who…do you really need a diagram, here? Those cops and firefighters may be supreme badasses, but they gossip like middle schoolers. But that’s beside the point. What matters is that your feelings for Jo seem to be mutual. I’m failing to see the problem, here.”

“The problem is that her audition is tomorrow, and she’s supposed to go back to Savannah next week.”

“And that could complicate things,” Finn said, connecting the dots. “Have you talked to her about getting more serious?”

Sawyer hedged. Of course, he’d wanted to bring it up with her, but… “She’s been burned before, taking things really fast. I’d never hurt her, but I don’t want to push too hard, either. We’ve been kind of living in the moment. I’m not sure either one of us thought we’d end up here. With, you know…”

“Feelings so big that Neptune looks like a fucking map dot in comparison?” Finn supplied. At Sawyer’s WTF stare, he added, “What? You think you’re the only guy who’s ever had feelings for another person? I am wildly in love with my wife, you know.”

“Okay, but it’s not like most guys really sit around and talk about their feelings,” Sawyer said.

“Maybe not with just anybody,” Finn agreed. “But the whole ‘men shouldn’t have emotions’ thing is a load of horse shit. Anyway, I’d never leave a brother in need.”

The word, with all its implied closeness, hit Sawyer center mass, making his rib cage tighten. “Thanks.”

Finn nodded, leaning his forearm on the bar and dropping his voice to keep their conversation private from the scattering of people drinking and laughing around them. “I know it might be hard to believe it now, but my relationship with January was complicated in the beginning, too.”

Sawyer kept his jaw from dropping, but it took some pretty monstrous effort. “You guys were complicated?”

“Well, yeah. I was playing for New Orleans at the time, and in case you haven’t noticed, that’s not exactly in the same time zone as Remington. Plus, let’s just say January and I have some past history together that made getting together a challenge.”

One day, Sawyer was going to pry that story out of his buddy, but for now, he settled for, “Damn. I had no idea. You guys are so perfect for each other.”

Tilting his head, Finn huffed out a laugh. “I didn’t always know it, though. What can I say? We professional hockey players have hard heads.” He rapped his knuckles against his temple, his wedding ring glinting in the bar light. “It took some doing for me to see what was right in front of me, but once I did, I knew January was the love of my life.”

“How did you figure it out?” Sawyer asked.

Finn put his beer on the bar, all traces of his usual, cocky smile fading into something a lot softer. “I followed some excellent advice.”

“Which was…?”

“To fight for what I really cared about. Well, that and get my head out of my ass,” Finn qualified with a laugh, “although I think you’re a lot smarter than I was. My point is, things might get complicated. They might even get bad before they get good again. But if you care about Jo-if your feelings really are the size of Neptune-don’t be afraid to fight for her if you have to.”

Sawyer looked across the bar at Jo, the tiny white lights strung from the rafters casting a warm glow over her face. She turned to meet his gaze, their eyes locking together for just a beat before she smiled, and oh, hell, Finn was right.

She was worth fighting for. Even if Sawyer lost it all.