Novel Square
Chapter 44
Chapter 44
Chapter 44
GRACE
Okay. This night isn’t taking the direction that I thought it would.
I’m a little annoyed by that because there was a second when I thought Jay and I were sharing a
moment.
It’s not that I want things to go that route.
But it would be kind of nice to know that this relationship wasn’t so one-sided.
“You ready?” he asks.
I’m not worried about the pain. “I’m no stranger to pain, Jay.”
His mouth turns down. He doesn’t like my answer.
“I’m just saying that I know it’ll hurt, and that’s all right. I can handle it.”
“There are…other side effects.”
Oh. I’m not sure I like the sound of that.
But even as I’m thinking it, he’s rolling up my sleeve and feeling for a vein.
“What kinds of side effects, Jay.”
“Nausea. Dizziness. Depression. High blood pressure.” He positions the needle at the crook of my arm.
“While under the influence of Argenti, shouldn’t operate any heavy machinery.”
I glance up.
His eyes are laughing at me.
“Nice commercial,” I mutter.
And he did deliver the information like a tv commercial for the next wonder drug.
“In all seriousness,” he says, any humor now gone. “It can cause hallucinations. Heightened anxiety.
And, well, pain.”
“But it may bring my wolf back, right?”
He nods.
“Do it, Jay.”
I don’t ask anymore questions because the answer won’t affect my decision. I’m not sure there are any
drawbacks that would stop me from trying to reconnect to my wolf.
I grab his wrist a second before he pushes the needle in. “Can this kill me?”
He grimaces. “In rare cases…there can be side effects.”
Can I live the rest of my life ‘half’ way? I’m not sure. If there is a chance to be whole again, I have to
take it. And, really, if this does go horribly wrong, it’s not like anyone will miss me.
“Do it.”
“Yes ma’am,” he quips. Then: “Grace…don’t die on me.”
My arm burns at the injection site.
Jay places a pillow on the ground and encourages me to lie down before the fire. It’s hot and after a
few seconds I feel like I’m sweating.
Then my stomach cramps painfully.
Jay disappears into the kitchen and comes back with a wooden spoon. He snaps it in half and puts the
long thin part of the handle between my teeth.
“Bite down,” he tells me.
I do. And not a moment too soon.
My teeth start chattering.
Then I sit up and vomit into the embers.
“Oh my gods, I’m sorry!”
Jay shakes his head. “Don’t apologize. Do it again.”
As if I want to puke in front of this man.
Not so long ago, he was naked and virile in front of me. We’d shared an intimate meal.
Now I’m convulsing on the ground, gagging up the dinner he prepared.
“Jay… leave me alo—“
“No.”
Just that word. Nothing else.
I’m cold to the bone but sweat breaks out over my body. It’s like the flu, only a thousand times worse,
as it feels like whatever silver is in my body is being dragged out of every bone and cell.
And so begins several hours of sickness.
I sweat and shake. I heave until I’m convinced there can’t be anything left in my body. And through it
all, Jay is beside me.
My hands hurt so much. My stomach clenches like a werewolf is clawing my insides. If I was alone, I’d
cry and scream.
But with Jay here, I’m mindful of every sound I make.
“Don’t be tough for me, Sister,” he tells me.
But he’s pained too. I don’t think he thought this process would drag for so long or be as awful as it is.
As the sun cuts through the window, I shudder and collapse for the last time. My body spasms
occasionally.
“Did it work?” he whispers.
I call to Ava in my mind. Come back to me, girl. Please.
It feels like I’m dropping a stone into a well.
There’s an echo… But it’s only my own voice coming back to me. This content © Nôv/elDr(a)m/a.Org.
“I don’t think it did,” I whisper.
Jay sits back. He looks disappointed, but he hides it well. “I’m sorry, Grace.”
We’re back to where we started. I’m a wolf-less human.
He’s strong and powerful.
I close my eyes and hope he doesn’t see the tears that leak free.