Chapter Thirty- One: Another Stroll
He pulled his fingers from mine and walked some steps away from me as we took another stroll of his on a fine evening. When he stopped, he looked beyond the stream that divided us from the lane of trees that lined the other side.
“I never asked to be the Alpha King you know. Just Ryan. Just a man with desires and dreams and emotions. With that freedom to do what he wanted without anyone placing limitations or embargoes.”
I approached him. “Well, that is a way to describe your ambition in life. May I ask why?”
“When you have been given no control over your own life since the very moment you were born, Clara the very thought of freedom stirs you in ways you cannot begin to fathom.”
I held his hand, feeling a shiver run under my skin from the point of contact. He gave me a small smile, stroked my knuckles and let go of my hand. I tried to fight the wave of disappointment the absence of contact left in its wake.
“Do you mean to tell me you have no control now? I must admit I find that hard to believe, my lord. You are the alpha king after all. You have the power…”
“Power I may have, true, but control over my own person is far from me. My duties as an Alpha, my people, high society, they all tell me the things I can and cannot do.”
When he blinked, that was the moment I realised I had been staring as he spoke. Ryan looked into the distance, his eyes unfocused like he saw something no one else could see.
“I do not understand why you let others dictate how you should act, or who you should be.”
“It comes with the territory, I’m afraid. The power is not as clear-cut as it seems. The pack has a measure of influence over the office like it or not, and with the right words spoken to the right ears all my power will be gone. I can influence them too, to some extent, but I have to be careful not to overdo it, or else there would be chaos. It gets overwhelming, this dance.”
“I would like to see how you hold up against those vipers, which brings me to the reason I asked you out today.”
Ryan stopped walking so I automatically stopped too. His piercing eyes shone as usual as they stared into mine, and for some reason it made my heart skip a beat.
Suddenly, it hit me that he was planning something.
“Ryan? What are you up to?”
“Clara, would you give me the pleasure of a dance?”
I was puzzled.
“A dance? But there is no music.”
“Not right now, but there will be a ball two days from now. We can dance then.”
“What?” I exclaimed.
“I am certain you heard me, Clara. I am not one to repeat myself, but if I must. Will you give me the pleasure of a dance at the ball coming up in two days?”
“Ryan,” I stuttered, searching my head for words.
“I c-can only give you a dance if I attend the ball, and we both know I cannot. It would not be proper.”
“I do not care about propriety in the eyes of the nobility.”
He held my hand, the warmth of his fingers seeping into mine. “All I care about is you. I want to show them all that you are not just any slave You are the woman I…” he trailed off.
I wanted to ask what he meant, to get him to say those words that seemed to hang on the tip of his tongue, but I let it go merely because I could barely form a sentence.
“The point is, I need someone there with me, someone who is not stuck up like the rest of high society. Someone I can have a little fun with.”
“And for some reason you believe it should be me?” I bit my lip, feeling the blood rush back in when I let it go.
He shook his head.
“It is not proper, Ryan.”
“Why?”
“What will I even wear? How am I meant to act? And look at my belly. There are a lot of questions.”
“All which I would answer in good time. The only thing I say to you is this: Do you trust me, Clara?”
His question made my mind stop for a few seconds. I thought back on our every interaction since the very day we met. If there was one thing that drew me to him, it was his honesty.
I nodded slowly. “I trust you.” he smiled. “Good. Because we are going into town now to get you a dress.”
“What? Now?” I chuckled at how flustered I grew at his words.
“Yes, we are going right away.”
“Oh God, Ryan, you are so hard headed.”
The ball
Nervous anticipation gripped me as the carriage rolled through the grand hall’s extensive grounds. I felt a sense of gratitude towards Ryan for lending me his extra carriage, and asking Henry to look after me for the evening. It was an act of kindness that provided me with a hint of comfort in the midst of my anxiety.
As the carriage came to a halt, I took a deep breath and gathered my composure. The ladies from the surrounding carriages began to whisper, their curious gazes fixed upon me the very second I stepped down from the carriage. I felt bare to their stares, but I tried to ignore their prying eyes, my head held high, and made my way towards the imposing entrance of the mansion.
The murmurs followed me as I crossed the threshold, but I willed myself to remain unfazed. I was determined to rise above their petty judgments and embrace the evening with grace. Ryan was waiting for me there, and I wasn’t ready to disappoint. Following the directions I had been given by Henry and the fact that I had scrubbed the ground before we arrived, I navigated the opulent corridors, guided by the strains of music that grew louder with each step.
Finally, I reached the grand ballroom, its doors standing tall and imposing. I gave the uniformed man that stood at the entrance a smile and my name. His stern expression softened slightly as he announced my presence to the room, and I could feel my smile slip at the split second of utter silence that followed. The moment hung in the air, and I could feel the weight of their gazes on me.
A pang of unease flickered in me as I noticed the room start to buzz with murmurs and whispers. Their eyes seemed to possess blades and cut me open, scrutinising every aspect of my being. Maybe it was my ordinary name that had stirred their intrigue, but I refused to let their obvious disdain dampen my spirit.
Summoning my courage, I stepped forward, my eyes scanning the room until they found him. Ryan. My heart skipped a beat at the sight of him, standing at the bottom of the grand staircase, his striking blue eyes fixed on mine. The whispers faded into a distant murmur as our eyes locked. Maybe it was the sound of the music, maybe it was the air in the room, but something was drawing us to each other.
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