Daddy’s Hot Sauce

EMILY

The icy wind that was dampening my skin made me bring back my consciousness and so I tried to feel my surroundings and it was quiet. No one was talking and only the sound of a machine nearby was creating a sound.

But there was something that was making me feel warm. It was someone’s hand that was on the top of my hand. I could not help but to open my eyes and to see who it was.

“Anders?” I whispered as I saw him sleeping on the chair while his head was leaning on the concrete wall. He was holding my hand and I couldn’t help but to let out my tears as I cannot tell him about our baby.

I bit my lower lip just to endure the pain and as I stared at my belly; it was feeling different now and so; I panicked, but I have to hide it for myself. I don’t want him to be worried about me because I care much more for my baby. But why am I feeling something weird in my belly?

“Babe, are you okay? Sorry I felt asleep. Do you need anything?” he continuously asked me like it was our first meeting.

I looked at him and wiped off the tears in my eyes. My heart is pounding and I can hear it. I am nervous about the way he looked at me right now, but I hope that he would understand.

Suddenly, my eyes widened after he hugged me tight. I couldn’t understand why he was doing this to me.

“Should I be the one who asked the question?” I said and smiled at him but he hugged me tighter and I can hear his slow sobbed while his face was at my back.

I could not believe that this billionaire man was crying on my shoulders and it was just my first time seeing him like this.

“Are you okay?” I worriedly asked him and faced him without hesitation.

Anders took a deep breath and wiped the tears in his eyes.

“Emily, I know about it and I am so sorry for not taking care of you. I know I’ve been busy these past few days. That’s why I could not even think about you and your cravings and…”

I strongly shook my head and said, “It’s okay. I totally understand about it but why are you crying?”

Anders didn’t speak, but sparingly smiled at Emily.

She could not understand what was happening, so she panicked and said, “Tell me Anders, what happened to my baby?!” she said emphatically and touched her belly.

“Emily, calm down please.” he whispered.

Anders tried to hug me once again, but I didn’t let him.

“Tell me what’s happening! I cannot feel anything in my belly. Where’s my baby?!”

I shouted at him and panicked as I caressed my belly in front of him. I didn’t mind everything that was inserted into my skin ’cause all I care about now was my baby. The tears ran down my cheeks when I couldn’t feel him in my belly. The beat of my heart was fast, and I screamed once again. I cannot help myself. The pain was still in my belly, but something was not right. I know and I can feel it.

“I’m sorry, Emily, it’s my fault. I’ve never given you enough time.” he went to my side after he apologized.

But, it’s not the right time. I know he understood everything, but why he couldn’t just leave me alone?

“Leave me alone.” I said and bravely looked at him. I could not even see his face right now.

“But, Emily, please let me stay,” he pleaded.

I pulled back my hands and let out those tears in my eyes as I turned my back. I wanted to cry alone; I wanted to bring back my baby, but no one could do that, even Anders. Even though he has plenty of riches, still he could not bring back our child and that made me even more pain.

I know it’s been just two months, but why did God allow this to happen? I’ve never been a bad person, right? I wiped the tears once again and shouted at him.

“Get out of here!”Published by Nôv'elD/rama.Org.

I can feel his presence. I know he’s still here and I know he would not go even though I pushed him away. All this time I didn’t even know that I’m pregnant and the child in me was innocent and yet he was taken from me.

“Please Anders, it’s not your fault and don’t feel guilty about this. I was planning not to tell you this, but seems God made its way to let you know about our child.”

I said to him and sarcastically laughed at the situation because I don’t know what to think and feel right now. It’s killing me from within and I could not even take it away.

“Emily, please let me stay here. You are not the one who got hurt, even me!” he said emphatically, and that even triggered me.

“So, you’re blaming me for this?!” I screamed at him.

I saw him washed off his face and came closer to me. “That’s not what I mean.”

“Just get out! I don’t want to be with you and I–I don’t want to see you!”

I was screaming out loud ’till my throat was aching ’cause I know it would help, at least for the meantime. I pointed the door to him and this time I saw him let out a heavy sigh. His eyes were just like mine and sure he was feeling the same too. But, I could not face him now ’cause this is my fault and not him.

I heard the door was shut with no words from him and so I cried out loud for the pain that was buried in my heart. The guilt inside me was consuming my mind and I cannot think of something clearly enough to decide if I will let him in or not. I just want to cry out loud.