Novel Square
Chapter 141
AstonUpstodatee from Novel(D)ra/m/a.O(r)g
I hit Kira
It’s a memory that’s etched in my mind, a constant reminder of my own flaws and weaknesses. I was consumed by a toxic mix of emotions guilt, shame, and a deep-seated desire to push her away. I thought that if I could make her hate me. I could finally move on from the pain of not being able to have her.
It was a split-second decision, driven by a twisted desire to prove to myself that I was the monster I thought I was. I saw the fear in her eyes, the shock and confusion, and for a moment, I felt a pang of regret. But I pushed it aside, telling myself that this was what needed to happen.
“I’m sorry.” Kira cried, her voice shaking with tears. “Why are you doing this?”
I didn’t respond. 1 just stood there, frozen in my own self-loathing. I wanted to believe that I was doing this for her own good, that I was setting her free from the toxic cycle of our relationship. But deep down, I knew I was lying to myself. I was doing this for me, to ease my own guilt.
As I looked at Kira, I saw the hate in her eyes, and for a moment, I felt a twisted sense of satisfaction. Maybe this was what needed to happen. Maybe this was the only way we could both move on. But as Brax hauled her away, I felt a hollowness inside me that I couldn’t shake.
I realized that hitting Kira hadn’t made me feel better, it had only made me feel worse. I didn’t know in what world hitting a person would make me lose feelings, I didn’t know what the hell was thinking.
In the days that followed, I couldn’t shake the memory of Kira’s face, the pain and fear etched on her features. I knew I had crossed a line, and I didn’t know how to go back. I was trapped in my own hell, and I didn’t know how to escape.
I tried to fill the void with distractions, with work and hobbies and satisfying my pregnant mate on and off the bed, but
I had nothing seemed to work. I was haunted and I felt like I needed to apologise but that would just ruin all the progress maid and send me right back to the beginning.
On the day it happened, I was surprised to find Mara pleading on Kira’s behalf. I had expected her to be indifferent, or even happy, about the whole situation. But instead, she seemed genuinely concerned for Kira’s well-being.
“Aston, please,” Mara had said, her voice soft and gentle and I wondered if she wasn’t the same person that wanted Kira dead.
I was taken aback by her words. I had expected her to be on my side, to tell me that I had done the right thing. But instead, she was defending Kira.
hy were you sticking up t you hated her.”
her, Mara?” I asked, trying to understand. “You’ve never liked her before. In fact, I thought
Mara sighed and shook her head. “I know I haven’t, Aston. But that doesn’t mean I want to see her hurt. And besides, I think I was wrong about her. She’s not as bad as I thought. She’s actually quite nice once you get to know her.
I raised an eyebrow, surprised by her admission. “You’re starting to like her, aren’t you?” I asked, trying to tease her.
Mara blushed and looked away. “Maybe a little,” she admitted. “But that’s not the point. The point is that you need to make things right with her. You beat her up up for a simple mistake.”
I sighed and rubbed my temples. I was getting a headache from all of this. “Fine,” I said finally. “Til talk to her. But I’m only doing it for you, Mara.”
Mara smiled and leaned in to kiss me. “Thank you, Aston,” she said. “I know you’re doing it for me, but also know you’re doing it because it’s the right thing to do.” I knew too well that I wasn’t going to talk to Khra has been one cranky b**h lately
L
and I was trying to be obedient while she was still being nice.
“Let’s get married soon,” I said, pulling back from Mara after the hug I don’t want to wait any longer. I want to start our life together and put all of this behind us.”
Mara’s eyes lit up with excitement. “Really?” she asked, her voice barely above a whisper. I didn’t have to go one knee but I’mm sure she got the message.
I nodded, taking her hand in mine. “Really,” I said. “I want to spend the rest of my life with you, Mara. And I don’t want to wait any longer to start that life. I want to wake up every moming with you by my side and fall asleep every night with you in my arms.”
Mara smiled and leaned in to kiss me again. “I want that too, Aston,” she said. “I want to spend the rest of my life with you.”
Now that putting a ring on her finger was out of the way, I decided to visit Mara’s parents without telling her. I figured she was nervous about going back home with a baby on the way, and I understood why. It could be pretty embarrassing. So, I thought I’d just go talk to them myself.
It had been a while since I’d spoken to them, but we used to be close when my parents were still alive. I hoped some of that warmth still lingered. I didn’t pack any bags, planning to make it seem like I was just stepping out for a bit but I found myself lingering in the hallway, hoping to catch a glimpse of Kira
It had been days since I last saw her, and I couldn’t shake off the feeling of guilt. I needed to know she was okay, but I didn’t deserve to talk to her. Just seeing her from afar would be enough
I heard footsteps approaching and my heart sk*i*ed a beat. Could it be her? I turned to leave, not wanting to be caught lingering around, but then I saw her. Kira. She was walking down the hallway, her head down, lost in thought.
1 froze, taking in the sight of her. She looked okay, but I knew she was hurt. I wanted to reach out, to apologize, but I knew 1 didn’t deserve to. So I just stood there, watching her from afar.
She passed by me without even noticing I was there. I felt a pang of sadness, knowing I had lost the right to talk to her, to be near her. But I was glad I had seen her, glad I knew she was okay
I watched her go, feeling a mix of emotions. Guilt, regret, sadness. Everything sad.
1 got up and informed Mara that I was going out, trying not to disturb her as she was trying to find sleep. She murmured a gentle “okay” and snuggled deeper into the blankets, not asking any questions. I was grateful for that, knowing she needed her rest. I quietly grabbed my keys and wallet, and slipped out of the room, trying not to make any noise.
I quickly got dressed, my mind racing with thoughts of what I was about to do. I called the driver, who arrived promptly to take me to my destination. As we drove, I couldn’t help but think about what I was doing. I had no idea what to buy for her parents and I hated to admit it but I was a little nervous, so I decided to get a little bit of everything nice. I figured that way, I couldn’t go wrong
The drive was quiet, with only the sound of the engine breaking the silence. I stared out the window, watching the city go by, Jost in thought. I
We arrived at the store, and I was greeted by the friendly face of the sales associate. “Hi there, sir! How can I help you today?” she asked, eyeing the empty basket in my hand.
“I’m looking for some gifts,” I replied, trying to sound confident. “I want to get something nice, but I’m not sure what.”
The associate smiled and nodded. “Well, we have a wide selection of items to choose from. What’s the occasion?” she asked and I told her all she needed to know.
She led me to a section of the store filled with beautiful flowers, chocolates, and other gifts. I was overwhelmed by the choices, but the associate helped me narrow it down. I ended up with a bouquet of flowers, a box of chocolates, and a fruit basket. I filled it up with all of her fruit.
I got somethings for her dad too and I was just trying not to be hervous. It had been years. I wanted nothing more than to be done with this marriage.