Chapter 281
Chapter 281
Luca’s POV
“I’m sorry you were unable to reach me. I couldn’t even get to you because of my lack of a number, and
it never crossed my mind to borrow someone’s cell phone to use in trying to get you you.” He continued
to speak afterwards, voice easing out slowly as he spoke.
“No, no… it’s alright, it’s alright.”
I continued after a few pause. “Also, it’s a good thing you didn’t use someone’s phone to try to get to
me, my phone number is a really private thing and I rarely give it out, for security reasons.”
“Ohh.” He whispered out after a few seconds and I started to nod my head.
“Yeah. I’m just glad you’re alright. I thought something had happened to you.”
I watched as the guilty look crossed his face in the next moment, right before he made to speak.
“Nothing happened to me, I didn’t even hit my leg against a wall. I’m so sorry I made you worry
unnecessarily…” He trailed off after a few seconds and slumped into his seat, a small, dejected sigh
slipping out his slightly parted lips, and after a few long seconds had passed, he started to speak once
again.
“I haven’t even been here for long and I’m already making you worry so much to this extent, I feel so
bad just thinking about it and I’m so sorry you’re going through all this stress because of me once again
like you used to do back then…”
“Whoa, whoa… slow down.” I said as soon as I pushed myself into a more straight sitting position, as
soon as all what he was saying started to sink into my head. I stared at him pointedly, and our eyes
only remained locked for a few more seconds before he was averting his gaze. The inside of the car
wasn’t all that bright because the sky was already really dark at this very moment, but a little bit of light
had managed to bleed through the windows from lit up companies and passing cars rear end lights. I
puffed out a deep breath after a few moments before starting to speak.
“Armani…” I started to say but he cut into what I was trying to say without me getting more than a word
past my lips.
“We both know it’s the truth, don’t try to…” He started to speak but I shushed him after a few seconds,
making him trail off on a small sigh.
“Relax, Armani. You’re so worked up at the moment, can you try to take in some deep breaths?” I said
after a few moments, and although he didn’t audible respond to me, the sound of him doing what I had
just requested made me relax a little as I listened to him drag in deep breaths into his lungs to puff it
out after a few moments, and he repeated that motion for a little while.
“What makes you think I’m going through so much stress because of you?” I asked after a moment and
watched as he hesitated at first before shrugging his shoulders a little.
“I used to stress you a lot back then.” He started to say after some time, voice low but still being able to
reach my ears just fine. I remained silent after what he had just said, because I knew he wasn’t done
yet, and after a few moments had passed, he continued to speak after shifting a little in his seat.
“When I was still growing up and all, I used to put you through a whole lot of stress. I remembered
getting you into a whole lot of trouble with dad, all because you wanted to protect me.” He passed after
that and gulped a little before talking silently. After some time, he decided to continue to speak.
“Because I was weak as fuck, and couldn’t do a damn thing on my own, you always had to take my fall
for me, to take the blow for me if there was one, to take the blunt every time, and so on. You’ve always
willingly faced dad’s warth each time, and most times I was the reason for having you raise your voice
at him.”
“Armani…” I started to speak but decided to trail off when he shook his head at me without saying a
thing, as I watched as he blew out a small breath before continuing to speak.
“I used to feel really guilty back then, because I just couldn’t be the son father wanted me to do. Father
used to talk to me about how I was supposed to be as strong and fierce as you, and I wanted to be like
you so much, you know?” He paused and breathed out a small laugh before continuing, and I remained
silent throughout.
“I wanted to be like you so much at a point, wanted to make you proud of me for once, instead of you
having to always protect me, so we’d be able to protect each other and both make father proud,
because that's what he wanted so much…” He trailed off and puffed out a slow breath before
continuing.
“But then... Then, I realized at a point that I couldn’t be like you, because for one, I couldn’t be a little bit
fierce to begin with, compared to you. All what you were, I wanted to be so bad, but it was like my body
and head had just chosen to not cooperate with me during that time. It was so hard to watch and listen
father staring at you with pride, but then each time he stared at me, it was always with disappointment
inside of his eyes, or anger, one or those two emotions and nothing more.
“Whoa there, where did you get all these from? For one, Dad was never proud of me to begin with.” I
said to him as soon as he made to drag in a deep breath into his lungs and I watched as he pinned me
with a look right before he began to speak once again, fingers starting to move around on the seat
between us absentmindedly.
“Oh, he was. He was proud of you a whole lot of times, a whole lot.”
I started to shake my head immediately. “Armani, I don’t know what made you come to these
conclusions but he was never ever proud of me, he isn’t that kind of parent…”
“I take it he didn’t tell you to your face then… but he was pretty proud of you. He was always using you
to make comparisons each time he was speaking to me, and those times when you’d be training and
he’d make me stand beside him watching you, in order for me to try to master some of your moves by
just staring at you. He used to talk about how proud he was of you, and how you were such a quick
learner, and how he was sure you’d take over from him really well, and how his enemies were all going
to be afraid of you because of how fearless and fierce you were, and about how he was sure I’d never
be able to become half of what you’ve already become, but I should still try either way, to avoid being
killed at a point.”
As Armani continued to speak, I started to realize just how messed up my father had been, because he
didn’t ever say any of those words to me, and had instead said all those to my little brother, to make
him feel really bad, like he wasn’t even needed around to begin with. I’ve never hated him more in my
life like I did in that moment, because I was sure that all those words which father had said to Armani,
despite how young he had been back then, had still managed to stick deep inside of his mind. I puffed
out a deep breath and racked my fingers through my curls, and after a few seconds had passed, I
decided to continue to speak.
“Armani, do you know how messed up our father was?” I started to speak and Armani blinked at me at
first before starting to nod his head. I shook my head at him before continuing.
“No… I don’t think you understand what I meant. Father never said any of those words to me, not one.
Not a single one. So why was he saying all those about me behind my back, and saying it to you? He
was doing all these to make you feel really inferior… and I was sure that back then, he might have
been thinking that he was motivating you by all what he had been saying to you, not knowing that he Content © NôvelDrama.Org 2024.
was doing zero to zero level of help to you back then.” I paused and puffed out a small breath before
continuing to speak.
“Also, who cares about if he’s proud of me or not? He wasn’t actually proud of me, he was just a selfish
bastard, that’s all. He only cared about himself and felt like he was proud of me because I was an asset
in which he can trust to leave his fucked up mafia and thousands of enemies to, and nothing more.”