Arranged marriage : Married to an unknown man

Ariana

It had been two weeks since that magazine incident. Two weeks since that small talk with Xavier. To be honest, the past two weeks had been complete bliss, pleasing, and gratifying.

I confronted Daniel and Sean who were trying to ignore me after that incident. They thought that they had put me in trouble I would be upset because of them, but they were wrong; I wasn’t. They apologized numerous times but I assured them that I wasn’t upset, it wasn’t their fault.

I felt like Sarah Park had unknowingly brought four of us closer, especially Xavier and me.

Xavier has been nothing but sweet towards me. Though in the past two weeks he had been too busy, he showed his extreme care and concern towards me. I was so touched by his solicitude.

After that nightmare, Xavier asked me to sleep in his room but I denied it. It was not easy for me. It took so much persuading for me to make him agree to that. He did agree but only on one condition. In return, he wanted more lessons. So, he extended the number of kissing lessons. And he certainly did make sure that I learn something out of it. To be honest, I learned a lot but I was still incompetent and Xavier was not giving up.

He kissed me passionately but didn’t try to proceed with it any further for which I was thankful for him. He surely sensed my discomfort since he didn’t force himself on me. That’s what I like about him, he always perceives my uneasiness, my discomfort and he tries his best to make everything comfortable for me. I was trying to learn to lean into his touch. His touch was gradually making me forget all those sickening touches. He introduced me to something new which I had never even dreamt of.

My feelings for Xavier had grown stronger. His care, concern, sweetness, playful remarks, and teasing filled me with warmth. I liked this version of Xavier that no one had ever seen. People consider him a ruthless, dominant, and authoritative businessman but no one knew the sweet side of him.

Seeing him caring for me sometimes made me feel that I should share my fears and insecurities with him. But trepidation always took over me making me conceal everything back in my mind and heart.

I feared that if Xavier gets to know about my past he’d distance himself from me. I didn’t want that, I wanted him closer. He made me feel special, made me feel wanted. For the first time, I was being selfish because I wanted him near me, not away from me. I didn’t want him to see me with disgust as everyone else saw me.

I was broken from inside, no one had ever cared about me, everyone always took advantage of me. I was always alone and if concealing my past would keep him alongside me then I’d do it.

Because he’s the first man after my father who took a stand for me, who threatened others to protect me, to keep me safe, who gave me freedom, who gave me a place which I could call home. He’s the first man who made me feel confident, who saw potential in me, who saw beauty in me. The first man who kissed me. He’s the first man towards whom I had grown intense feelings.

The feeling for him was so intense that I wanted to immerse myself in that feeling. The feeling was so passionate that I wanted to flow in that passion. The feeling gave me warmth and I wanted the warmth to flow in me forever.

I didn’t know what that feeling was. Was that intense feeling… love? Was I in love with him?

I was not sure about it because I didn’t exactly know what love is? I know I had been yearning for love all my life. What I mean is, how will I know that someone loves me? What does it feel like when you’re in love?

And most importantly, how would I know that I’m in love with someone?

I don’t know anything about what exactly love is, but…

If fear of losing someone is love then yes, I had fallen in love with him.

If the feeling of unexplainably drawn to someone is love then yes, I had fallen in love with him.

If getting worried for someone when they’re not around is love then yes, I had fallen in love with him.

If caring for someone and desiring for their well-being is love then yes, I had fallen in love with him.

If finding solace in someone is love then yes, I had fallen in love with him.

If finding comfort and safety by being with someone, but still getting weak knees when that person smiles at you is love then yes, I had fallen in love with him.

If all these beliefs are an abstraction of love then without any doubt I had fallen in love with him.

But I still needed just one sign to confirm if that the feeling was really love. But how?

And Xavier, I didn’t know what Xavier felt for me. Did he feel the same as I did? What if he’s still not over that forceful marriage thing? After all, I was forcefully given to him. What if he’s still upset with me for marrying him? But he had not shown any sign of repulsion, instead, he had been behaving quite opposite.

I decided to just let that proceed as it was proceeding. I didn’t want to make anything awkward between me and Xavier. I’d not think of asking more from him, I’d cherish every single moment, every single day I spent with him. That’d be my biggest treasure.

I heaved a sigh and pulled myself back into reality. I had been revising very important documents. The documents were of great value to the company.

Xavier, Daniel, and Sean were planning to buy land in France to build a new manufacturing unit there. There were many other business rivals from New York and different countries who were planning to buy that land. So, the government of France had announced a conference in which all those who wanted the land had to present their design abstract which had to be compulsorily eco-friendly, and the one whose project would make an impact would get the land.

For the last two weeks, three of them had been working hard day and night, sitting with their engineering team and other members who were working on the project to make sure they win the land in France. So, whatever documents they would finalize, Xavier would give them to me to check.

I started working again but my focus was broken by a knock on the door.

“Hey, hope I’m not disturbing you?” Kevin peeped his head inside my office.

“Hey, come in and no, you’re not disturbing.” I smiled at him. He entered and sat on the chair in front of the desk.

“So what brings you up here. Any work?” I asked.

“Come on, Ariana, can’t I come to meet you?” He questioned.

“I didn’t say that.” I playfully narrowed my eyes.

“Okay sorry. I came to ask you for lunch. It’s almost lunchtime.” He said, raising his hand to show me time on his wristwatch.

“You know, Lauren and Scott aren’t here and Mrs. Miller is also busy so I thought I should ask you.” He explained.

Lauren and Scott were gone out with their respective bosses and Xavier was also not in the building, they all had gone for a meeting.Content from NôvelDr(a)ma.Org.

“You know, we all haven’t had lunch together for the last two weeks. So will you come with me? If you’re not busy.” He said.

I glanced at the documents, my work was almost done so I thought a small break wouldn’t hurt. And Kevin was right, we hadn’t had lunch together for the last two weeks as we all were busy with some work or other.

“I think I can spare some time. So… let’s go.” I stood up and arranged my desk before heading out.

We decided to have lunch in a diner across the street which was our regular spot for lunch. We sat and ordered our food.

“I think I should note today’s date in my diary,” Kevin said, making me confused.

“Why? What’s special today.” I asked, frowning my eyebrows.

“It’s the first time we are having lunch alone. Basically, the first time we are alone.” He smiled sheepishly.

“Kevin you really are funny.” I shook my head and laughed.

“At least my funny remarks make you laugh.” He said, staring at me intently. I heard no playfulness in his voice and his eyes showed no jolliness. I felt like the situation became a little awkward. He never behaved like that.

The waiter came with our food, eliminating all the awkwardness between us. We ate our lunch, talked, and laughed. Kevin insisted to pay for our lunch but I totally denied it, but he was adamant to pay. But I can be stubborn when I want to so we ended up paying an equal share. After paying, I was about to stand up when Kevin stopped me.

“Hey, wait, wait, I have something to talk to you about.”

“What is it?” I asked, intrigued.

“It’s the first time we have spent time alone so I… actually wanted to ask something.” He said, rubbing his back of his neck.

“You’re acting strange today Kevin. Is everything alright?” I asked.

“Um…yeah.. everything is alright. I just want to ask something.” He said.

“Then ask away. What’s stopping you?”

“Let me muster up some courage.” He mumbled, lowering his head.

“Kevin?” I said. What’s wrong with him today?

He looked up and heaved a sigh, then met my gaze. I looked at him with confusion.

“Kevin wh-”

“Will you go on a date with me?” He cut me off by saying this. I became shocked by what he asked.

Date? I was speechless and baffled.

“Ariana, don’t get me wrong but I think I have grown some feelings for you. To confirm my feelings towards you I want to take you out on a date.” He said, looking at me.

“Kevin.. I.. I..” I wasn’t even able to form words. Since when he had feelings for me? Did I give him any wrong signal? I see him just as a friend. I had to clear things with him. I didn’t want to lose a friend.

“Kevin I.. I can’t. I’m sorry.” I said, looking at him. His face dropped instantly.

“Why? Are you with someone else?” He asked lowly.

Should I tell him that I’m married? No, I don’t think it’s a good idea. But I can tell him something else.

“Umm…yes, Kevin,” I said truthfully

“Don’t ask me with whom. But I like him a lot and I can’t betray him even in my dreams.” I added. His face became glum and he looked away.

“It’s okay. I think I’m too late.” He said, looking at me and smiled which didn’t reach his eyes. I didn’t want that, I didn’t want to see him sad. He’s a very funny and jolly person. I didn’t want to be the reason behind his sadness.

“Kevin, don’t be sad. I’m sorry if at any point I made you feel what you felt for me. I never did anything intentionally. I consider you as my friend. I never had a friend in my life before I met you all, and I don’t want to lose any of my friends.” I explained.

“Ariana, you didn’t do anything wrong. It was just me who felt something for you. And it’s okay, one-sided liking happens. I’m just feeling bad that I made things awkward between us by confessing my feelings.” He said lowly, not meeting my eyes.

“Kevin, look at me,” I demanded softly. When he complied, I continued.

“Kevin it’s good that you confessed your feelings, at least it made you feel light otherwise this thing would have eaten you inside, would have made you depressed. I don’t want that, I want my friend to be happy. And no, nothing will become awkward between us if you want to.” I assured him.

“You’re really sweet Ariana. Many girls don’t give a damn about these kinds of situations. They just reject you and never look back. And you, you’re concerned about me. And yes, you’re right, I feel light. And Ariana, I may have made this awkward but I’ll not become a fool by losing a friend like you.” He smiled sweetly. His smile proved that he accepted the rejection and was okay with that.

“This is what I want, your sweet smile. Promise me nothing will come in between our friendship?” I stretched my hand and held it in front of him to make a promise.

“Promise.” He placed his hand on mine without hesitation.

“And don’t worry you’ll soon find a girl ten times better than me.” I gave him my sweetest smile to cheer him up.

“I would be on cloud nine if I get a girl even 50% like you.” He laughed making me shake my head. I got my friend back.

“Whoever you are with is one lucky man. He has reserved a rare diamond for himself.” He said, making me blush.

Kevin doesn’t know that I’m the lucky one to have Xavier in my life.

“Now if everything is settled, can we go back to work?” I asked.

“Yep, sure. I don’t want Mr. Knight to shout at my friend. Let’s go.” He said standing up.

We exited the diner and made our way towards the building. I was laughing all time because of Kevin, he was cracking jokes. We were back to normal.

I reached my office and sat on my chair. I was about to start work when the intercom beeped. I picked the receiver only to hear the angry voice of Xavier.

“Come to my office right now.”