Chapter 31
Phoebe Point of View
I always heard people say that if you love your life, life will love you back; I would say, it’s debatable.
I had always did my best coming in terms with my situations how hard they were and how much time it took me to do so. I had learnt a lot along the side while dealing with them. Something I failed to learn was to deal with a person who confuses you.
Many people I know was good in dealing with confusing people, including Mrs. Clara and Mrs. Jones. I don’t know it’s their age, experience or something else but the day they found me half dead and woke up as a closed off and a confusing person, handling a broken person like me was nothing tough to them.
All they did was provide me with basic necessities and a straight order to work for them. I was surprised how effective that command was. I had to oblige them without a question back and in return, they did not ask me much about my past.
I was always envious of such people who can tackle with situations and different people easily, something I found regret not learning in the current situation.
When I left Nicco, I had come up with many ways of possibly meeting him again and this isn’t one of them. To me, meeting him again even coincidently was a farfetched idea. Still, here he is, sitting in the very dining room she was used to cleaning every day from past couple of months.
What is he doing here? Was the first question that hit me.
Out of all the possibilities in the universe, I did not expect being saved by a lady who is very closed related to Nicco.
“Nonna, are you not going to stop stuffing me? I’m full Nonna and I don’t think I can eat anything for few days with the amount of food you made me consume right now.” Nicco complained.Ccontent © exclusive by Nô/vel(D)ra/ma.Org.
The voice… his voice is enough to make me nostalgic. I missed him so much that the moment I landed my eyes on him an hour ago standing right at the door being greeted by Mrs. Jones, I didn’t know if I should stand still and capture his picture in my eyes or I should hide somewhere.
My eyes blurred in tears when I noticed how pale and lean he looked. He has dark circle around his beautiful eyes and his skin color turned unhealthy. Something I always loved in Nicco was his bright eyes but I cannot see anything bright in them anymore. They were blank and bleak.
The moment I saw him, I thought that was it. He would rush to me, hug me and kiss me first and if he has any anger then he would take it out later but what I did not expect was lack of acknowledgement.
“No, you have to put on some meat and turn back into the charming handsome grandson you were once. Look at you all skinny.” Mrs. Clara, whose name I came to know as Clara Russo, commanded adding some more spiced rice to his plate.
Nicco groaned when food was added to his plate while he gave his grandma and Mrs. Jones a stinking and an irritating eye. Meanwhile, he did not even look at me for once all the time. It has been almost two hours that he arrived with a shock to me and he did not look at me not did he acknowledge me for once.
“I want to meet this girl who made you like this. I would like to knock some sense into her for doing this to my grandson.” Mrs. Clara chided filling up Nicco’s glass with water while Nicco didn’t care to answer back. “But I’m rather furious on you for turning up this way just because a girl left you.” Mrs. Jones added, smacking his shoulder.
My limbs shivered at the conversation going on. I want to tell them that I didn’t want to make my Nicco this way but it seems like I can never tell them that with the cold shoulder Nicco is giving me.
Partly I’m happy to see him again but partly I’m worried for him. Of all the things, I did not expect Nicco to become a drunkard and senseless for such a long period just because I left him. I’m not a ridiculous person; I know what place I hold in his life. I know how much he loves me and how much I mattered him.
Looking at him, I felt guilt consuming me for making the way he is now.
“Being with you for such long time, she did not even have a backbone to say her last goodbye to you, forget about fighting for your love. I wonder if she really loved you or was it your fascination.” Mrs. Clara ranted with a frown.
I felt like I was slapped on my face. I gulped my tears back trying to control the overwhelming emotions. I want to go away from here and hide somewhere again but only thing that is stopping me is Nicco.
Something tells me that if I run away from here now, then It mean I invited my own doom.
Well, what she said was not wrong too. I was coward to fight for him or at least gather some courage to tell him my decision to him directly. I was never suitable to him, with the new found guilt and mistake, I can never be with him ever.
Standing silently behind Mrs. Jones, I passed on the dessert plate with his favorite fruit cake. Nicco did not care to take it instead his grandma received it and placed it before him.
“Phoebe, get me crushed nuts to add on the cake.” She ordered me. I waited Nicco to stop me or refuse to eat nuts because he hates them. When I didn’t get any reply from them, I didn’t know what to do.
Nicco hates Almonds and pistachio. He simply detests them. Other nuts, he can try them out but those two he cannot even look at them. I immediately went inside the kitchen and looked for walnuts or cashews but found none. All I found was those two which he hates.
“I’m sorry Mrs. Clara, we have no stock of nuts currently. I will go to market tomorrow and get them.” I answered to which she nodded.
“Son, this is Phoebe Smith, newly added household staff. Your room was cleaned and prepared for you by her. If you have anything to change or needed anything, you can ask her and she will provide you.” No!
No please. Oh no! I’m holding up till now because we are in the presence of his family. If we were to be alone, then what should I do, what should I say?
Will he talk to me then? Will he look at me at least?
Nicco nodded curtly at her and finished the small piece of cake in two big spoon and leaned back on his seat patting his stomach. “I’m full Nonna. It will take weeks to hibernate from this.” He chuckled a little but the glow I knew is still missing. It is as if he is just chuckling courteously.
“Good, I’m planning to make do the same every day. Now, Phoebe, get him few bottles of water and a jug of juice and put them in the small refrigerator in his room. Levis will be back with my grandson’s luggage anytime soon, so arrange them in his closet neatly.” I nodded my head and trailed behind the jogging Nicco to his room.
I did not care about the dishes or the other chores waiting for me. Now that the time has finally come that I met him, I want to talk to him. Though seeing him again after months pleased me greatly, his ignorance towards me is like piercing my heart with thousands of knives.
Collecting the water bottles, I entered his room slowly and saw him already changed into comfortable clothes, working on his laptop. I didn’t know what to say or what to do, so I cleared my throat and walked inside when I still didn’t have his attention.
“Water – bottles.” I stuttered, waiting for his reply. I prayed to Gods to get a reply from Nicco. Any reply would do but just the acknowledge that he saw me or heard me was enough for now.
I stood in the middle of the room for few minutes expecting him to say something but he did not eve care nodding at me. With a resignation, I filled the fridge with water bottles and stood near the bed, “Nicco –” I called out in whisper, carefully.
He yet again ignored me and pretended to not hear me. Right now, right this moment, I want to hug him and ask him what happened to him. Why is he not talking to me!
I know he is angry with me and I want him to yell at me and if it would help him, then I want him to slap me but silence is not the punishment I can bear.
“Nicco please just listen –” I said a little loudly but was cut off by his curt voice.
“Get out.” He snapped not even looking at me. I would’ve liked it better if I could see the anger in his eyes but he wasn’t even looking at me. That hurts me the most.
And right that moment, I realized something. I’m trapped. I’m trapped with him and though he is not talking to me, I’m still imprisoned by the destiny and all that is waiting for me was punishment.
Heavens, why should you bring him in front of me again if you are not planning to let me live with him happily?
~*~*~*~*~*~