Alpha Billionaire Series

MADII

The beer took the edge off. Everything I'd heard over the past two hours sitting on Gavin's couch learning about com, patients had left me feeling distraught. Normally I would hide, run away and find a place to sort out my emotions alone. But I was sick of mourning alone. And I didn’t want to go home and sulk by myself again.

“So...” Gavin was so sweet. I knew he would never push me to do anything with him. He'd made that much clear. That's why I kissed him. Because for weeks I'd done nothing but stew over whether it was time to move on. Because Alice had pounded it into my head that Gavin liked me. And even though I hated to admit it, Mom knew I wasn't happy alone like this.

“So...” I set the empty beer bottle on the coffee table next to the trash from dinner. I didn't know what came next, bu I knew what I was feeling inside. The torrent of raw emotion left me mentally exhausted. I longed for the physical comfort I knew Gavin wanted to give me. I felt it when he kissed me; his body responded to me.

He didn't make a move. It wasn't necessarily a bad thing. I knew guys who were the strong silent type and given his stance on staying in the friendzone until I was ready, I knew if something was going to develop between us, it would have to be my move. I just hadn't made any moves on any guys in years, except the one man I'd never be with again. It was awkward. Me sitting there watching Gavin try to hide the way his body wanted me. He may as well have been tearing his hair out, the forced poker face was his tell. Thoughts of Drew pummeled my mind, but I pushed them away. He was gone now. I had to move on. And 20-year-old Madison would have made her move by now. So why was frozen on that couch unable to lean forward and take what we both wanted so desperately?

My chest heaved; I licked my lips. My hands curled into fists which I shoved between my legs, hoping Gavin didn’t notice my nerves. Then he surprised me, leaning forward and cupping both of my cheeks in his large hands. His strength surprised me as he kissed me deeply, stubble scratching at my chin and cheeks. I ran my hands up his sides and rested them on the backs of his shoulders.

“Is this, okay?” he asked me, giving me a moment to breathe. I only nodded. I didn’t know if it was okay. Fuck, I didn’t know what I even wanted in that moment, except for him to kiss me again, and he did.

He leaned in harder, rising up on his knees and towering over me on the couch as I lay back. He followed me down, pinning me to the cushions, and I kicked my shoes off as I positioned myself beneath him.

Feeling the weight of a man on top of me again made feelings stir to life inside of me that I hadn't felt in months. My groin ached to be touched. I clenched inside, moaning softly as his hand found my breast and squeezed it gently. Gavin rose up, peering down at me. “Are you sure this is okay? We don’t have to do this. You don’t have to do this to make me happy.”

“Just shut up and kiss me already.”

The grin he gave me was all I needed. Goodbye depressed, stuck-inside-yourself Madison. Hello adventure-seeker. Gavin lifted up a little, letting me get my legs situated, and I wrapped them around his waist. The only thing I could think about in that moment was getting him inside of me. It was the freest I felt since the moment I jumped into that water to go scuba diving. My mind was free from every negative emotion, and I was there with Gavin, in the moment, feeling electrified by every touch.

My hands worked at his t-shirt, pulling it up, so he took a moment to yank it off. When he did, I pulled mine off too, unhooking my bra afterward.

Gavin's hands smoothed across my skin, a thumb flicking one of my nipples before his teeth found it and softly bit down. I arched my back upward, finding him pleased by the reaction. He grunted softly, sucking my n****e into his mouth as he squeezed my b****t. The way he nestled himself between my legs revealed his hunger for me. His hard member pressing against my c**t.

“Shit...” I hissed as he bit my other nipple. I laced my hands through his thick brown hair, tightening down to a fist. I guided his head lower, across my navel and below. Gavin kissed and nipped at my skin, finding the rise of my hip bone with his teeth. Then he tugged at my yoga pants, pulling them down. I raised my hips as he backed up, taking down my pants and panties at the same time.

As he pulled them off, I shivered. My breasts turned to instant peaks on my chest, the air conditioning chilling me to the bone. He rose up, taking his own pants off and tossing them. The last thing he did was peel my socks off one at 2 time. With my right ankle in hand, he kissed the inside of my right calf, raking his teeth upward toward my knee. His hands spread my legs as his lips kissed farther upward toward my moisture.

“Is this, okay?” he asked again, carefully watching my face.

“Yes... It's okay.”

He kissed again, sliding a hand closer to the ache. “Are you sure this is okay?” His finger tickled my clit, teasing me, making my body shudder with want as he bit the inside of my thigh.

“Oh, my fucking God, it's okay...” I moaned, wishing he'd just do it.

“And you like this,” he said, as his tongue traced up to the top of my mound, slipping down to flick my c**t.

“God, just fuck me.”

“You want me to f**k you?”

“Please...” I grabbed his hair in my fists again and pulled his lips closer to my moisture.

Gavin obliged, sucking my clit, licking and drinking me in. The sensation of his tongue sinking into my pussy almost made me cum right there, but he stopped before I could. I whimpered as he pulled away, slowly crawling over me. “What about protection? I don’t want you to have any surprises a few weeks from now.” His sincerity was touching. “I'm on the pill” I was growing impatient with him, but I grinned. “Would you please put your cock inside of me and fuck me?” I raised my eyebrows playfully, but his expression grew very serious.

“I don't want to fuck you, Madison. I want you to feel good, but I want you to know that I care about you a lot, so I'm going to do this slowly. Alright?” The sincerity in his eyes told me he'd wanted to do this for a long time. And strangely, I felt like we were in sync.

I'd never looked at him this way until Alice put it in my head, and now I couldn't see him as anything other than a man I really wanted to make love to. I nodded, biting my lip as I pulled his shoulders down.

He slid into me, sinking his dick to my back wall in one thrust. I gasped as he pushed in, the sensation so amazing I had to clench around him just to stop my body from shuddering again. His heat filled me as he let his weight sink onto me. I dug my fingers into his back, spreading my legs wider to invite him deeper.

As he began thrusting, I panted, and whimpered. “F**k, it's been so long. God, you feel so good.” I clawed at his back, suddenly frantic for him to go faster.

As if he read my mind, he sped up, pushing me to my limits. With a hand on one of my breasts and one looped beneath my back, grabbing a handful of my hair, he bit down on my neck, sucking and nibbling as he f****d me. The way his pelvis rubbed over my c**t was so perfect. I felt my body tensing for o****m already. It really had been too long.

“Shit... Gavin..” I moaned, clawing at his back. “F**k me.”

“God, you feel good. You are so amazing.” His words in my ear made me shudder. As he bit down on my neck again, my body gave way to the flood of hormones. I convulsed beneath him, clenching around his d**k and sinking my nails into his back. I grabbed his a*s, pulling him deeper inside of me, and he pounded me. The whole couch shook, the feet scooting across the tile floor.

“God... oh god...” I spasmed, feeling his girth slide in and out of me, and then I felt him tense too.

The way his body seemed to stiffen right as he released, felt amazing. His thrusts slowed a bit, becoming more purposeful. Our bodies twined on that couch, I felt him release inside of me, hot and sticky. It ran out between thrusts, but I didn’t care. My body was so giddy from my own o****m.

Gavin lay there on top of me panting for a minute, and I could do nothing but catch my breath. Time stood still. In that moment we were one, our heartbeats coming down together. Then he pulled out and rolled me to the side so he could lay behind me. I had the same strange feeling of relief that I used birth control as I always did when Drew and had s*x, which made reality come crashing like a breaker over me.

I was glad my back was to him, so he didn’t see the look of horror that had to be on my face. Not only was he not Drew, but he was easily I0 years older than me. I lay there in his arms trying to calm my racing mind. I let my impulsivity lead me right into the jaws of this situation and now I was being digested alive.

“Are you okay?” he whispered in my ear. Then he kissed the side of my head as I nodded, unable to speak for fear of giving away my revulsion. Not that I was repulsed by him. It was actually quite the opposite. He was perfect, amazing everything I imagined.

No, I was mortified that I had let my grief propel me to this point. To where I threw myself at him instead of just telling him how I had started to feel things for him.

“You don’t seem okay.” He held me tighter against his chest. “If you're not okay, that's alright. You don’t have to be.” Tears burned my eyes, and I didn’t want to hold them back. “I'm so confused.”

“Yeah, I can imagine. That's why I asked so many times if what I was doing was okay.” He kissed the side of my head again, and I turned to my back to look up at him.Content held by NôvelDrama.Org.

“So, I made this choice. I stayed on purpose. I knew what I was doing. Why do I feel this?” I searched his eyes for answers but only found compassion.

“We do crazy things when we're hurting. You're not bad or wrong for feeling what you feel. You just have to sort it ou until you understand what you're feeling and what you want.”

I let the tears fall freely. I knew what I wanted. The only problem was it stood at odds with everything I'd told everyone for months—for more than a year. I wanted Gavin and I wanted him to want me back. I just didn’t know hov to tell Alice that—or Henry. And I also had no clue what to do about Drew. It wasn't like this decision had come lightly either.

When you sit next to a coma patient for months on end, wondering if they're ever going to wake up, you start to question everything you know about life. I knew that my heart was moving on; I just couldn't admit it until now. The guilt of telling his mother that I had started having feelings for someone else was too overwhelming to bear. And the fact that I had argued with everyone about this exact thing was a kick to the gut. My pride had never allowed me to admit that I might possibly be okay with letting go.

Gavin had only been a friend—Drew'’s doctor—because I had never told him how sweet it was that he checked on me or that he lingered around the room even though he had no obligation. I kept him at arm's length during every discussion because I knew how dangerous he was. I liked him.

And now this.

“It's okay, Madison. Whatever it is, we will get through it together. And I won't leave your side, just the way I haven't left your side yet. Okay?”

Gavin held me as I cried. There were too many swirling emotions going through my head and heart. I didn’t know which were right and which were wrong. I just knew I felt safe there with him.